The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/22/12
Your story held my attention. I loved the idea of the glass jar holding memories along with the bits of grass. It was a well rounded, satisfying re4ad.
This is a great read. You build the suspense right away and make me stop and wonder about the glass jar. The smells that trigger the memories are so distinct I can almost smell them myself. Lovely story.
11/26/12
What a sweetly powerful story on true love! You had a nice touch of suspense about the contents of the jar, and your descriptions were, as usual, superb! My favorite lines were the very last one and this: "Time held still in a jar escapes and he is no longer my aged and frail grandfather - moments of absence have inexplicably been erased. Beneath the sheath of his mortal shell, even as he draws his final breath, love’s battle with time shines through." Excellent writing! :)
11/26/12
Such simple ingredients so skilfully woven into an almost mystical experience with your poetic, lyrical touch. Brilliant, reflective work.
11/27/12
Excellent piece...so well done and told. Thanks.
God bless~
11/27/12
You have an amazingly well-crafted story. (How do you always do that?) :) You have mystery, poignancy, and nostalgia all intertwined. I could see the setting with their picnic. This was such an enjoyable story to read.
11/28/12
Oh my....I am overwhelmed with emotion right now. If only all of us had had a love like that in our lives! What a beautiful, touching, lovely story!

Excellent!

God BLess
11/28/12
Your entry is an amazing work of art. You carefully crafted too many descriptions to mention. I saw it all in full color. wow-masterful writing!
11/28/12
Beautiful! This story is masterfully told. It is moving and rings true. Well done. It was a pleasure to read this.