The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a deep poem. You managed to paint a wonderful description while using awesome words. I did wonder at the end, if the MC offered to help the girl or if she just put her out of her mind and went back to enjoying the park. Then I thought about which thing would be better minding one's business or seeing if there is a way to help. I like pieces that really make me stop and think and the open-ended part where the correct answer might be different for different people. This is an intense poem. Good job.
11/08/12
This is very descriptive, with its own challenge about blending in - at one with all humankind - while being disturbed at the sight of someone less well-off, and letting any chance to help pass right in by, like the rest of all mankind.
Well done.
Very nicely done - immersed in provoking thoughts. At first I thought it'd be an "Alice in Wonderland" type vantage point, but rather than follow the rabbit, you had us chase introspection. Congratulations on your win, Ellen.
11/08/12
Congratulations on your win. A most beautiful poem.
11/08/12
WOW! This is very well-written, but it's main charm for me is the message! You expertly expose our hypocrisy, complacency, and self-centeredness in the story within your poem. CONGRATULATIONS on your well-deserved ranking! :)
11/08/12
Congratulations on your win. Great work.
11/08/12
You created a convicting poem which kept a quality of lovely poignancy. Well done!
11/08/12
Ellen, this is outstanding in rhyme and rhythm--you are a talented wordsmith and I enjoyed every bit of this thought-provoking poem. Congrats on taking 4th place in the EC list.
11/08/12
You have a compelling message. Congrats on your EC!
11/09/12
"The neighborhood glances her way
then turns to their pressing tasks
of eating and tweeting and rest
and polishing up their masks."

My favorite stanza--especially the "polishing up their masks" part. You've captured an invisible truth about us all, haven't you? You are brave to be transparent and present the BIG picture, even when it makes the speaker of the poem an imperfect one. That's why your poem packs a punch.