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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Funny (10/04/12)

TITLE: A Funny Thing Happened On The Way
By Carla Procida


A funny thing happened on my way to Middle Age. Actually it wasn’t until I
bumped into its rusty gates. Creaking wide open, there appeared a house, in serious need of repair, drowning in uncut grass and a thousand weeds.

“I should have taken better care of it!” I said aloud as I began walking carefully over the broken slate walkway leading to the front door.

Where had the years gone? The once well built home was now in desperate need of a major overhaul. It sagged under the weight of inclement weather, both scorching heat and bitter cold for over fifty four years. It needed a painting to cover the gray peeling exterior and the hedges definitely needed a trimming. Winter was just around the corner and there was so much to accomplish!

I opened the front door and thought I walked in on an episode of Hoarders. Junk that accumulated over the years nearly reached the ceilings! Dreams and schemes cooked up were now spoiled, stinking, untouched and left to rot. There were piles of books unread and items I couldn’t live without, stacked up, still in their shrink wrap. Talk about a reality “check” show and me its star!

I decided to check out the attic. It was hard to see as a few light bulbs had gone out. I forgot a lot of what was stored up there. Funny, but I recalled the aged, yellowed photos and toys and games from my childhood but couldn’t recall items I carried up there a few minutes before.

Reluctantly I headed down to the basement, the place I dreaded the most. Dank and dark, I bumped into a table where an old Lionel train sat idle, bells and whistles silent, lights long since extinguished. On a shelf LP’s, eight tracks and cassettes sitting naked in a wooden milk cartons, sad love songs now warped memories but impossible to discard.

Lastly, I went out to the backyard. Looking ahead I pictured a much different scene. Instead of the rusted outdoor furniture and ivy wrapped around the ancient swing set, a
manicured lawn, neat little garden, gas grill and gazebo was in its place. I guess you’re never too old to dream.

And although I’m still in the process of getting settled into middle age I have to remember how fast the years fly by and before I can say “55 Alive” I’ll be asking for my senior citizen discount. Before I know it I’ll be on the path to old age. I hope it won’t take me by surprise as middle age has and that when I arrive everything will be in order, not cluttered and confusing. That wouldn’t be funny, but very, very sad.

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This article has been read 294 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 10/12/12
You did a brilliant job with this allegory. So many of us hoard feelings and memories piling them high in the gray matter of our brain. I could see a lot of resemblances between me and that old house. It is important to have a thorough spring cleaning and of course preparing for the winter months is a must. Your words really touched me and I saw in myself remnants of a past that I am trying desperately to hold onto but it is just weighing me down and cluttering my mind up with junk.
Joanne Sher 10/14/12
Clever and fun analogy - really liked it!
Noel Mitaxa 10/14/12
You have so lightly touched on the discovery of being closer to the crypt than to the cradle. Great images in your writing, stitched together with healthy threads of self-deprecation.
C D Swanson 10/15/12
Nicely done! I enjoyed the entire piece. Thanks.

God bless~