Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  

Win A Publishing Package HERE            

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Banquet - deadline 8-16-12 10 am NY time (08/09/12)

TITLE: My Request
By Ruth Neilson
08/15/12


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

The queen was a brilliant actress. Just hours ago, the slave girl had watched her mistress pace around the room as if something had been bothering her mistress but she wasn't sure what.

But now that the banquet had started and everything was perfect, not a sign of her nerves were apparent.

The queen's banquet for the king and his advisor seemed to be going well. The cooks made sure every item of the menu was cooked to perfection and it smelled delicious. But she wasn't invited to the banquet. The slave girl would be lucky to enjoy a taste of it later during the clean up.

Her mistress had been tense for several days leading up to this banquet. Gossip said that the mistress had sent a letter to her family asking them to fast and pray for three days. No one was sure why. The only thing that the slave girl knew was the mistress had commanded everyone who served her would fast as well.

She could hear her master and mistress talking, laughing at shared jokes as the banquet continued. Their guest joined in the gaiety of the evening. The musical tingle of the dishes that filled the air was punctuated with loud bursts of laughter.

The wine was flowing freely now and the slave girl heard her master speak, "Queen Esther, whatever you ask will be given to you. Whatever you want, even to half the kingdom, will be done."

There was a pause and the slave girl held her breath, not wanting to miss a single word of her mistress' response.

"This is my petition and my request." Her mistress' voice was determined but was filled with the proper amount of respect. "If I have obtained your approval, my king, and if the king is pleased, spare my life--this is my request; and spare my people--this is my desire. For my people and I have been sold out to destruction, death, and extermination. If we had merely been sold as male and female slaves, I would have kept silent. Indeed, the trouble wouldn't be worth burdening the king."

The slave girl's eyes went wide and she rocked back onto her heels, feeling her blood start to drain from her face as the king loudly demanded to know who would do such a thing.

Her mistress' voice stayed strong, despite Haman's protests. "The adversary and enemy is this evil Haman."

The master stormed off as the sounds of Haman falling onto his knees before her mistress, pleading for his life. Her mistress cried out and the slave girl slipped in to make sure everything was fine. Haman had lost his balance and fell upon the mistress' couch. The slave girl moved to aid her mistress before the master returned, but she was too late.

The master returned; his face turned red at the sight before him. "Would he actually violate the queen while I am in the palace?"

Haman stammered some sort of explanation as the king's dark skinned manservant spoke up. "There is a gallows 75 feet tall at Haman's house that he made for Mordecai, who gave the report that saved the king."

The king spun around, his fine robes whipping around violently. He gestured violently, stabbing the air in towards Haman. "Hang him on it!"

Haman wailed for mercy as the guards lifted and took him away. The slave girl looked towards her mistress, waiting for the command to come to her aid. It never came. Instead, the king opened his arms to his wife in a quiet invitation. The slave girl watched as her mistress moved away from the banquet table and into his arms. He pulled her close, holding her and the slave girl could only guess that he was reassuring her.

She glanced towards her male counterpart with a questioning gaze. He nodded and gestured that they both were dismissed. This was now time for their master and mistress to be alone and in peace.
~~
Story based from Esther 7 (HCSB)


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 257 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Verna Cole Mitchell 08/16/12
I enjoyed the retelling of this story (one of my favorites). It was interestingly told from a different viewpoint.
Catrina Bradley 08/16/12
Reading this story was like being a fly on the wall. I love Biblical fiction, and this is one of my favorite stories. Nice!
Camille (C D) Swanson 08/17/12
A fabulous job with this entry. I love how creative your story was of Esther. Interesting view you shared, and I always enjoy Biblical fiction as well as scripture reality. Nicely done.

Thank you. God Bless~
Noel Mitaxa 08/18/12
Good imagineering of the Esther story, but I wonder of you could have used a few synonyms for "the mistress," which seemed a little stilted and repetitive as you set the scene.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 08/18/12
You did a spectacular Job retelling this story. Even though I knew the ending I found myself excited to keep reading. I really enjoyed seeing this from the slave girl's POV.