The Official Writing Challenge
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This is sweet. I've read quite a few Martha and Mary stories these past few weeks but this one takes the cake! I think this is a grand story and can so relate to the MC. What an important lesson there is in this piece. You captured it masterfully.
07/26/12
This is a sweet story. One thing to watch for though, don't retell the same things. That will use up your word count and you don't want to do that! This was my favorite paragraph:

"Tony’s wife quickly ran to the closet and pulled out the vacuum. As she ran it over the living room carpet, Tony stood there looking at her. His smile was small at first then grew as their eyes met. She sighed deeply as she realized it was the fourth time she’d vacuumed in the last twenty minutes."

Very good job:)
07/26/12
I enjoyed this piece very much. It was creative and well crafted. It held my attention throughout, and I loved how patient the hubby was with the wife.

We can all relate to this story, I know I was smiling the whole time.

Great message and well written...thank you.

God Bles~
07/26/12
I enjoyed this piece very much. It was creative and well crafted. It held my attention throughout, and I loved how patient the hubby was with the wife.

We can all relate to this story, I know I was smiling the whole time.

Great message and well written...thank you.

God Bles~
07/26/12
I enjoyed this piece very much. It was creative and well crafted. It held my attention throughout, and I loved how patient the hubby was with the wife.

We can all relate to this story, I know I was smiling the whole time.

Great message and well written...thank you.

God Bles~
07/28/12
What a delightful story and one that so many of us can relate to! We all want to look our best and have everything immaculate, sometimes to the point we can't even enjoy our company when they arrive. Well written. Good job. God bless!
07/28/12
Very nice. It's funny how we get all uppity when company is due, when really who even looks at things like the floor or whatever?! If the company is great, everything else pales into insignificance. A lovely story with a beautiful message. Well done.
07/29/12
Loved the interaction between the couple, and the subtle parallels with Martha and Mary.
I also enjoyed your down-to-earth distinction between simply offering hospitality and all the stress that accompanies entertaining.
07/31/12
I really enjoyed this...a warm love story to warm the cockles of my heart....well written and on topic!
I really liked the paragraph that states potlucks are where you bring what you can and let God take care of the rest (paraphrased of course). This is profound when you think about it as it is probably how God would have us live our everyday lives as well. This ministered to me in this way and I thank-you for sharing.
07/31/12
I was so caught up in the story (and totally identified with the wife in wanting everything perfect). :) The Mary's and Martha was a fun touch, like icing on the cake. You made me smile.
08/01/12
I can somewhat relate to Martha - but not to this extreme. :) I love how you made her almost a caricature of the worried hostess. It seemed to take a while for you to get in a comfortable groove - I think the writing in the second half is stronger than the first. A delightful story - good plotting and pace. I enjoyed this a lot!