The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/12/12
Remembering the good times makes for a pleasant journey down Memory Lane.

I think your second paragraph would have been a better introduction to the story. Just an opinion, but your first paragraph would fit well in the sixth paragraph where you describe gathering together for lunch.

You told a great story, but it needed a little more "show." Ex. Describe Rafe's loud laughter...compare it to...did he throw back his head? Did it echo through the pasture?...

So glad you wrote a story about a time with which many identify - including me.:-)
07/13/12
You managed to bring me back to simple days of yesteryear...and you brought tears to my eyes in recall.

Although your story is "cleary takes place in the South" aside from your breakfast differing a little from breakfast here in the East...I totally related to this whole well written and beautifully executed story.

I too hope Rafe is well...and thank you for this story. I was touched and it made my heart smile and cry at once.

God Bless~

07/14/12
Beautifully written. I really enjoyed your reminiscing story.
I really enjoyed this trip down memory lane with you. Of course, my memories are different from yours but there were tears in my eyes as I read your story and recalled the carefree days of my own youth growing up in a small town. Thank you so much. It was a good read.
07/16/12
Great memories. I thought the first paragraph was a foreshadow of some event to be described but didn't happen.

Nicely done. Made me wish I was there with you.
07/18/12
Warm memories of simpler times thaat you have captured so beautifully here. Well done.
This is lovely. I thank you for taking me with you on this journey into your memories. it's important that these stories get passed on to generation after generation lest we forget. You handled the topic in a fresh and powerful way.
Congratulations on ranking 1 in Masters and 14 overall!