Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Guard Your Heart (06/08/12)
TITLE: I'm No Uterus
By Wilma Schlegel
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It’s completely ridiculous and hilarious.
I thought of the coffee mug while I was searching recently for a new project to knit. One pattern I found was for a knitted heart (not the valentine, but the organ). I thought to myself, very unique and quirky, right up my alley, but what would I ever do with it? And then I got my own ludicrous idea. How about using it as a character in a play, a puppet sort of thing.
The heart could be a guest on a show where he sits next to the host and is interviewed.
The interviewer’s questions would go something like this.
“So Mr. Heart, what do you do for a living?”
Heart: “I pump blood.”
Interviewer: “Ah, a laborer huh?”
Heart: “Well, I’m no uterus.”
Interviewer: “Careful, no slurs here. All I’m saying is that your work sounds, well like a lot of work, kind of gross, too, wouldn’t you say?”
Heart: “It’s my job, it’s what I do. I’m good at it and nobody else can do it.”
Interviewer: “Oh, what happens when you go on vacation?”
Heart: “What do you mean?”
Interviewer: “You know, a little rest and relaxation.”
Heart: “At rest I pump out about sixty pulses a minute.”
Interviewer (getting frustrated): “A sick day then, what do they do when you take a sick day?”
Heart: “I don’t take sick days. Even that time when I was broken, I had to keep pumping.
The whole body would shut down if I stopped.”
Interviewer: “Come on, nobody’s indispensable, who do you think you are? Do you think you’re anywhere near as important as I am? I can have a day off whenever I want one.”
Heart: “There’s really no comparison. All I can say is that I might go as long as one hundred years or more without stopping.”
Interviewer: “Well, and all I can say is that a laborer like you should be well taken care of.”
Heart: “I told you, I’m no uterus.”
Solomon wrote “guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life”. So I probably shouldn’t have that second bowl of ice cream and I probably should get up and do something aerobic, and I will because I want a healthy heart. Vital as ‘Mr.Heart’ is however, Solomon probably meant for us to guard our entire beings. We can do this by constantly growing in our Christian walk through prayer and studying the word and having regular fellowship with other Christians. Then not only for one hundred years, but for eternity we can live with the Lord in Glory.
Bible verse: Proverbs 4:23, NIV
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