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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Question (05/24/12)

TITLE: Trapped
By Frances Seymour


It was a misty rainy Monday afternoon when my boss asked me to stay and work overtime. The weather outside was dreadful and the temperature a few degrees chilly for December. So, I chose to head home and cook supper for my family instead.

It was about a 12 mile trek to my house from work. Most days I enjoyed the view but today the outward scenery was gray. However, as I cruised along, I couldn’t help but think about how great my life had turned out. I spent many wasted years on men that treated me second-rate before I found the love of my life. The cool thing is, he owned a house—something I’d always dreamed of having. We’d only been married about a year and a half. I didn’t know life could be so easy. Ken was a hard working man and for the first time in my life, I felt secure. My fifteen year old daughter felt the same way. Life had certainly taken on new meaning and purpose. I accepted Jesus into my heart and life about four years ago. What a difference He has made! I’m grateful for the sister who invited me to church that night and to the Lord who spoke clearly to my heart.

Anyway, I am driving along my usual route when out of nowhere, another vehicle careened into the passenger side of my car. I heard the deafening crunch of metal against metal just before my head jerked back and then slammed into the side glass. I felt nothing more—heard nothing more and knew no more. I don’t know how long I was out of it, since my body was present but my mind somewhere else.

I lay in a bed for months, maybe even years drifting in and out of consciousness. Most of the time, I was in a beautiful place, filled with peace and serenity. Every once in awhile, I’d be awakened to someone poking or prodding my lifeless body, moving my torso this way or that and propping me up on pillows. ‘Oh how I wish they’d leave me alone and let me remain in the tranquility of my mind.' One day, I got so aggravated that I yanked the tube out of my gut with my one good arm. Of course, they put it back in, and then restrained me so that I could not do that again. I am so tired of them pampering me and pushing stuff through that tube to keep me here. I know they probably love me, but I cannot walk, talk, eat or communicate. Truth is, most of the time I don’t have a clue about who they are. Every once in awhile, I think I recognize a couple of them and I try desperately to talk, but they cannot understand anything I try to say…so frustrating. Lord, why? Why am I trapped in this body that refuses to work?

Then one day I heard a lot of people talking about death and funeral homes and preachers. Were they talking about me? Was I really going to die? What is death at this point, relief, finality? Then someone bravely approached my bedside. She looked at me through eyes of love and tears and said, “Dianne, you have pneumonia and that is not good for someone in your condition—completely bedridden. I love you so much and I’ve missed you for years. I will always miss the sister that I lost in that car wreck in 1999.” She was crying worriedly. Then one lone tear slid down my cheek as I realized the depth of what she was saying. I’ve been in this pitiful condition for years. Why Lord? Then this thought came to mind. I don’t know where it came from but it was a comfort. “It’s not for us to wonder or even question why, but to trust in God’s plan and be ready when we die.” I’m ready Lord, I’m ready. Take me home. Soon the light darkened on the one side and grew brighter on the other. Finally, I was able to move freely and to enjoy everything on the side that I’d visited only in my mind for so long. I can see mama’s smiling face coming this way. And is that daddy that I see in the distance? Everyone is so welcoming and friendly. I never knew I had so many friends!

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This article has been read 432 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Hiram Claudio05/31/12
A very creative take on the topic (which I thought you covered very well). I like the MC's resolve at the end about choosing trust in the Lord over her questions. This might seem like a challenging or sobering story to some but I found it among the best kind of stories ... ones that make you think. Well done!
C D Swanson 05/31/12
An all together prolific piece that was crafted in a clever way. Great job with this...I loved the ending and how she was immediately able to walk and feel better once her spiritual body was out of the flesh one. And the parents welcoming her. Gave me chills. I saw my earthly father's face when you wrote that part. Thanks.

God bless~
Leola Ogle 05/31/12
Wow! How sobering! I love how the MC was in a place of tranquility most of the time. I've often wondered about people in this vegetative state. Your entry gave us much to think about. God bless!
Laura Manley06/02/12
When I first began reading this entry, I figured it would have a different outcome. I don't know if this actually happened to someone you know, but you write with such knowledge of the person in that broken body, I wonder. I did notice that you seemed to jump from tense to tense and that perhaps my lack of understanding. All in all, your entry, although a difficult subject to read through, was very well-presented and well-written.
Sandra Renee Hicks 06/05/12
Greetings -

Thank you for this piece that gives much to ponder. It's good to be challenged in our thinking.

Please note:

Paragraph that begins, "It was about.." - fifteen year old should be fifteen-year-old.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 06/06/12
This is a bittersweet piece. I know that God will allow the spirit to hang on until something that needed to be done is taken care of. When my mom's aneurysms ruptured, I had been in the hospital and it took me a few days to get up to see her. When I walked in the alarms went off her BP skyrocketed. But soon signs that things weren't working right showed up. The next time I saw Mom I knew she had left this body that was being kept alive by machines because she didn't have a glow about her anymore. Your story reminded me of that. God will rally for us until we hear the right thing that makes a difference forever.