The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a great story. My heart hurt a bit for the MC. But I liked the lesson you showed with this. I've seen this happen before at award banquets, usually someone notices. I can imagine the pain of not being recognized. But it teaches a great lesson.
05/17/12
A beautiful lesson in humility. It was so well written. The MC was waiting, heart thumping, proudly poised. And, then nothing!
Great job with this. The lesson learned was invaluable, and the mileage the story has spanned infinite. Nicely done. Thanks.

GOd Bless~
05/18/12
I so enjoyed the detail in your story. I believe it is very difficult to tell a story like yours and still show the reader the details. You did an excellent job!
05/18/12
Loved the 8th Grade Awards Ceremony story! Oh, I could feel the MC's heartache. Great application of the theme Fame.

To deepen the impact, you could delete or reduce the 'blue' introspective, and get to the Ceremony story sooner, since this is the truly delicious part of this short piece. Also, you could expand on how Jesus shifted the MC's perspective.



05/19/12
I liked the story idea, but the writing needs some clean up in the technical areas; "share" is misspelled, and when it gets to the middle, well, it gets jumbled and distracting with the way the paragraphs are written, since they change from a consistent format of spaces throughout the writing.

Your writing ideas are good, but the story would have been more formidable with the dialog and paragraphs cleaned up.

05/21/12
This was a well written story that flowed nicely from the very beginning. I too felt bad for the MC at not having her name called but loved the life lesson that it turned into. Nice work!
Good job building up the suspense and describing the MC's thoughts and feelings. I do think the first sentence was too long and wasn't really necessary for the rest of the story.
05/23/12
How delightful, not to minimize the MC's heartache, but delightful in how I was all prepared for the MC's grand moment, to discover her talent that she would receive her award for, only to be crushed along with her in her disappointment. Good job. God bless!