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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Fame (05/10/12)

TITLE: My time-His Time
By JoAnne Nanton
05/17/12


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My Time – In His Time
Ordinarily one would tend to associate the color blue with somberness, sadness and even abusive circumstances; and oftentimes they do, but I’ve noticed that at the most auspicious occasions in my life, the color blue, in variant shades, has been my pop color of choice: turquoise, for my eighth grade Awards Night ceremonies, a tale of which I am about to shar, royal blue, for high school graduation day; powder blue, on my wedding day; aqua, for my newborn baby as he left the hospital; and Egyptian blue, for the cover for my book. Each event represents my so-called claim to fame, but this tale holds prominence on my life’s timeline of events.

It was a night that will never be forgotten. My slinky turquoise skirt suit was a ‘show stopper’ with its bias-cut frilled hemline that moved in pendulum fashion as I walked, and I imagined myself sashaying across the stage to receive my awards during the 8th Grade Awards Night ceremonies.

“The award’s program is about to begin. You’re in Row 3, Seat 10; that’s the last seat of this row,” the usher prompted me.
My name began with Cu.
“Cu…Finally, another three names before mine!” I beamed with self-motivation.
Continual bursts of applause filled every nook and cranny of the room as family and friends beamed with obvious pride. Every person in my row would have to exit pass me to the stage..
“Finally, I’m next!” I told myself, unable to contain the inexplicable joy I felt at that moment.
“Accept certificate with the left hand and shake hands with the right hand,” I kept rehearsing,
Dahlia stumbled over my legs as she passed over me.
“Sorry!” she fumbled at a strained apology.

“Lights! Camera! Action!” I mentally dramatized.
Sweaty palms. Then a flashback - words from a song we sang on the bus, en route to school outings…
“Whenever I feel afraid
I hold my head erect
And whistle a happy tune
So no one will suspect
I’m afraid....”

Ms. Leslie announced the next name on the list before her.
“Our next award is for Daniels, Cory!” She declared in a sing-song tone of voice.
I surmised that names must have gotten mixed up somehow, so I waited…and I waited…and I waited some more. Frankly, I waited all night but NEVER heard my name called and I was more than disappointed.

I was numb. I could not speak. All of a sudden, it was if I could not hear. For the most part, I could not move. The only movements were internal–a throbbing, panicked heart and a bathroom call to which I could not readily heed..

No, there was no curtain call for this impressionable teen that night. And, while I critically pointed the finger of blame, I’ve since come to believe that, beneath it all, it was a divinely-appointed event–a reserved kairos opportunity that was yet to unfurl. Fame, shame, or blame, Jesus, when He entered into my life, put it all into perspective.


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This article has been read 229 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 05/17/12
This is a great story. My heart hurt a bit for the MC. But I liked the lesson you showed with this. I've seen this happen before at award banquets, usually someone notices. I can imagine the pain of not being recognized. But it teaches a great lesson.
CD (Camille) Swanson 05/17/12
A beautiful lesson in humility. It was so well written. The MC was waiting, heart thumping, proudly poised. And, then nothing!
Great job with this. The lesson learned was invaluable, and the mileage the story has spanned infinite. Nicely done. Thanks.

GOd Bless~
Laura Manley05/18/12
I so enjoyed the detail in your story. I believe it is very difficult to tell a story like yours and still show the reader the details. You did an excellent job!
Theresa Santy 05/18/12
Loved the 8th Grade Awards Ceremony story! Oh, I could feel the MC's heartache. Great application of the theme Fame.

To deepen the impact, you could delete or reduce the 'blue' introspective, and get to the Ceremony story sooner, since this is the truly delicious part of this short piece. Also, you could expand on how Jesus shifted the MC's perspective.



Marina Rojas05/19/12
I liked the story idea, but the writing needs some clean up in the technical areas; "share" is misspelled, and when it gets to the middle, well, it gets jumbled and distracting with the way the paragraphs are written, since they change from a consistent format of spaces throughout the writing.

Your writing ideas are good, but the story would have been more formidable with the dialog and paragraphs cleaned up.

Hiram Claudio05/21/12
This was a well written story that flowed nicely from the very beginning. I too felt bad for the MC at not having her name called but loved the life lesson that it turned into. Nice work!
Laura Hawbaker 05/23/12
Good job building up the suspense and describing the MC's thoughts and feelings. I do think the first sentence was too long and wasn't really necessary for the rest of the story.
Leola Ogle 05/23/12
How delightful, not to minimize the MC's heartache, but delightful in how I was all prepared for the MC's grand moment, to discover her talent that she would receive her award for, only to be crushed along with her in her disappointment. Good job. God bless!