The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/18/12
Oh. This was so hard to read. You wrote this in such graphic detail, and brought the scene to life, which made it hard to read. A sign of an excellent writer.

The bullying, a very contemporary topic today. I wrote about my "own true bullying" story a couple of weeks back. And, this made me cringe remembering being beaten to a pulp myself.

Very realistic encounter. My heart was aching for Reed.

An excellent job, and a well written of an all too familiar "encounter."

God Bless~
05/21/12
Great details in this piece - I could see it all going down. I definitely felt for both kids.
05/21/12
Oh wow. This is awesome. Not that I liked the story, per say, but wow. I kept hoping for a "good" ending. This would be perfect for an anti-bullying campaign. Nice job with this!
05/21/12
This is such a powerful story. The imagery you used made me cringe, reading of poor Reed and the pain he was enduring. But I found reading of Josh's struggle between self preservation and coming to the aid of another even more confronting. I know I would like to think I'd step in and help, but in all honesty, I just don't know if I could. What a brave MC you developed in this. Well done.
05/22/12
What a large question mark this story ends with. Masterful, thought provoking, challenging; but so unsatisfying. I wanted the kid to be 'The Karate Kid', to take so much but then...

Reveals my heart where bullying, in all forms, is concerned.

One negative. I felt this sentence was too long and needed work; 'Reed was very short, skinny, sported red hair, wore a band jacket and had been carrying a study bible right up until Mac made his first statement that the bullying was about to begin by knocking it out of his hand.'

But the ending... it covers anything else.

Thank you.
05/22/12
This was tragic and inspiring. My son was bullied in his day, he was considered a nerd, he was and is also a Christian. Now he's a police officer, the kind that doesnt bully.
This is awesome, standing up for his friend in Christ's name. God Bless
05/23/12
Very well written; I would have liked to see the word Bible capitalized when mentioned.

But quite a thought provoking piece. Made me think of how many times Christians stand by when others are getting beat up for their faith...evoked some good thinking sessions out of me.

05/24/12
I must say this is my favorite story of them all. I love it when people are courageous in the face of bullies. Great ending and congratulations!
05/25/12
You did a good job. I enjoyed reading it.