The Official Writing Challenge
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Simply wonderful entry on the speculation of what the "wise men" were speaking about amongst themselves in search of Christ. Great dialogue and fine running dialogue especially with Herod. They touched on his "madness" perfectly.

Good job.

Loved it. Thanks.

God bless~
Awesome job. Herod had it all except what counted. Very good, well written story.
What a clever way to tell the Magi and King Herod story!

I was struck from the beginning, hook, line and sinker. A great story.

Just a few comments; I felt 'He had had motive to believe what he said.' was redundant. Allow your reader to use their own mind for the obvious. and of course leaving it out would mean changing the sentence that followed.

The comment about Herod converting to Judaism could be a baulk for many because he was the King of the Jews and most people even believe he was Jewish. Also, it wasn't him that actually converted but his family before him. Technical and maybe worth no more than the rubbish bin, but it made me stop and think and stopped the flow of the story.

A great story that was a pleasure to read. And I loved the last line. At first I thought it too was redundant, until I found myself wondering where He is today and can I see Him in my life.
I really like stories that fill in the possibilities of what might have happened and been said between the lines of the Bible's accounts. Thanks!
I so enjoyed reading this. You took me somewhere I was not expecting. I thought they were looking for Jesus as an adult. I always enjoy a nice surprise.

The only red ink I might offer is with the tag lines. Usually the he asked. would be in lowercase instead of capital because without the quote it's not a complete sentence but perhaps it's just a matter of style.

This was such a creative and fresh take on the topic. The ending was quite powerful I enjoyed the Wise Men musing over why Herod was mad. Great story!
Congratulations for ranking 13th in level four and 15th overall!