Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: rain (10/17/05)

TITLE: Priorities
By Donnah Cole
10/24/05


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

She tugged at my hand, but I resisted. Excuses began to arrive by the second.

"It's too cold, plus I've got to go fix supper anyways."

I didn't verbalize some of the real reasons. I'll have to fix my hair again. My new
outfit might ruin.


I just shook my head and turned to leave the porch to seek refuge from the dampness.

She caught my shirttail and tugged again. "Pleeease mommy…just this once."

Her petition suspended my departure as I turned to gaze into her eyes. The sea of crystal
blue drowned my soul in guilty reasoning. My daughter…youthful beauty clinging to
innocence and childlike wonders…motivated to enjoy God's creation on every occasion.
Why couldn't I have the same outlook on life? Why did I always choose not to enjoy
the little things of life?


The waves of accusations continued to pound me. How come I always say no? How
come I'm always so busy? Why, for once, can't I just break free from these daily
demands and just live a little?


The enemy's logic conquered my thoughts and advised that I ignore the guilt. I loosed
her hand from me, breaking the connection.

"Nah…your dad will be home soon, and you know how he gets if his supper's not
ready!"

The screen door slammed behind me. My mind shut her out and conveniently switched
to recipes. A pot of spicy chicken cabbage stew and homemade yeast rolls seemed to be
the perfect dish for the dreary day. I grabbed the yeast, mixed it with flour and warm
water, and placed a towel over the bowl so that the temperature would be conducive for
rising. Rising...

Her children shall rise up and call her blessed...

The proverbial scripture rose to the forefront of my mind, convincing me He was
encouraging my parental involvement.

So, I found her sitting on the porch's edge with her bare feet exposed to the drenching
rain. The cuffs of her jeans were soaked from the splashing drops. She hugged her knees
to her chest and alternated her hands into the downpour.

Ohhh, I whimpered, here goes...

"Hannah?"

It was one of those twinkling-of-an-eye moments. She whirled her small body around as
her wet lashes and puffy lids sobbed to me. "What Mommy?"

Ashamed of my earlier rejection, I hung my head as I shuffled toward her. My hands
cupped her face and lifted her countenance to mine. I didn't have to say, "I love you."
She knew my love was real when I exclaimed,

"Let's go dodge some raindrops!"

Hand in hand, we rushed into the downpour. Phrases of exhilaration shrieked from our
souls as we frolicked amongst one of God's masterful creations.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 599 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Michelle Fout10/24/05
ow.
good writing. I was able to be totally in synch with mom, in the moment. guess I have been there too often not to recognize myself. I enjoyed your ability to keep focused on the mom's reactions/conflicts and not get sidetracked into describing the childs reaction/conflicts until visually at the very end. Kept the story tight.
Good job. God Bless and Keep writing.
Karen Ward10/25/05
A struggle for many mothers, finding the child within and ignoring the 'Martha' within us all...
Shannon Redmon10/25/05
Left me speechless! And you know how difficult that is! This is beautiful writing identifying with the struggle in most moms!
Ann Grover10/28/05
I really enjoyed this. I like your exploration of the mom's reasoning and re-arrangement of her priorities. A wonderful 'seize the day' reminder... the opportunities pass too quickly. Thanks!
Katherine Douglas10/28/05
oooh! this was really good. I think you words are vivid.
Amy Michelle Wiley 10/29/05
Good story and good point!
Deborah Porter 11/01/05
Donnah, just wanted to pop by and let you know that you came very close to being in the Editors' Choice again this week. You ranked 10th out of 147 entries - quite an achievement. You are definitely going from strength to strength. Well done. With love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)