Sir Noble Christian Knight puts his best foot forward:
Do siren shouts of "Suicide!" assail your moat with grief?
Has Satan's pitchfork riddled your fort's walls with unbelief?
Then follow me to yonder bridge which sports a unique isle,
That awesome crisis hotline which makes every trial worthwhile.
To beat the crowd that bars your way and keep a steady pace,
You must replace your slippers glass for shoes of gospel grace.
For energy while running, do the manna hunt-and-scoop.
It doesn't take much effort, just a little flex-and-stoop.
As you may know, those wafers stand for His own broken flesh,
Which takes away that grave wet blanket from your heaving chest.
A quick "Passover speed chew" is the way to gulp them down.
So swallow your distress and spread the good cheer all around.
Aha, at last you've reached this place. But how your armpits stink!
Here, catch this bar of soap and water jug before you sink
Beneath that ripe goatskin that must be cleansed to hold new wine
released and channeled via branches of the Vine Divine.
Don't trust me here? Then ask the payphone (which is really free).
Though hard for girls to figure out, it's simple as can be.
Just place a golden faith coin into this elected slot,
Then pick up the receiver like you've only got one shot.
Next type in "thanks," hit "pound" for "praise," await the dial tone.
And if you're scared to hear His voice, don't fear. You're not alone.
The yellow book is rife with tales of clueless wimps like you
Transformed to super heroes at this booth so tried and true.
Take Moses, who fled Egypt for a deed concealed in sand.
It's here he met the burning flame that turned sea to dry land.
It's also to this very spot that Gideon brought his fleece,
Oh what a change came over him, his courage to increase!
Bold Peter first denied, then later shared Christ's Word with force,
While Paul got revelation after falling off his horse.
This site showed them the light that makes a winner from a chump.
But what is this? Where are you running off to, dear? Don't jump!
What have I done, what have I said to make you want to die?
Your tear-stained cheeks berate me. Guess I'm not that great a guy.
Can't fathom how I muffed this rescue, sadly I repent.
Dear Father, please rain down on me your wisdom heaven-sent!
The connection sizzles, the cry goes through. Success! The distressed damsel steps away from the rail, receives the phone, falls to her knees, takes her own turn at self expression:
Yes, Lord, I know he means well, but I think you will agree
I've memorized my verses far more expertly than he.
Meanwhile his cutting Word sword makes me bleed to reach your hem.
I wish his mini sermons would commend and not condemn.
He treats me like a baby. What can he not understand?
Instead of so much sage advice, I need a helping hand,
Somebody to walk with me as we travel side by side,
And offer a platonic touch each time I seek to hide.
Her plea, short and sweet, is followed by a brief moment of silence. Afterwards the Most High sends a potent message over speaker phone, through which He imparts the following evaluation of Sir Noble Christian Knight's recent performance:
Give him an A for scripture ken and dry theology,
Big minus for espousing male superiority,
But note: in terms of "Humble Pie" he's surged from "F" to "C,"
A giant plus in attitude that drew her back to ME,
Thus proving that to lift her up he must resist his pride
And motivate with kindness. Then he'll have a happy bride.
There's no flaw either mate can't conquer with more self denying.
To mend a torn relationship, you have to keep on trying.
Greatly encouraged by these sovereign words, Sir Noble Christian Knight gives his wife a long-awaited hug and apologizes for his insults. Both linger long on the bridge, holding hands and rejoicing at the amazing transfiguration in their marriage inspired by this renewed assurance that with God all things are possible.
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.