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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: rain (10/17/05)

TITLE: He Hopes
By Sally Hanan
10/23/05


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Drops of life-giving wetness sink into the cracked, gasping soil, ground which had almost surrendered in hopelessness to never breathing life again.

Darkness hovers overhead. Cars gurgle by, their occupants peering forward as the wipers bow the knee, stand up, bow the knee, stand up.

A lightening fork illuminates the sky for a brief second, and a small child hides behind the kitchen curtain counting the seconds until the thunder growls in response. She is home alone. Her hold on her teddy bear relaxes as she reaches the number ten. She lifts him up to eye level.

“There teddy; see? It’s ten miles away. I told you you didn’t need to be scared.”

A boy and his dad jump up and down in the widening pools of water at the curb, the boy a flash of yellow swimming trunks, the dad a navy blue. Dad has the camera out. He wants his son to remember this moment - the doctor has said he has about three months left.

An old man sluggishly shuffles his slippers across the hall floor to peer out his front door, struggling and gasping as he pulls his oxygen tank beside him.

Will the nice lady bring my dinner today? The weather is somethin’ terrible. I wanted to ask her to get me some milk. I’m out of milk.

Thump, thump, thump on the red metal roof. The farmer smiles as the silver cups and hoses chug, chug, chug the milk away from his cows. He pulls out his cell phone. “You should hear the rain the way I can right now,” he texts his wife. “Praise God!”

“Accident on I35 and Rutland. Bad scene here, send help immediately,” the sheriff yells into the police radio. A child seat lies in the grass…..

***

God sends the rain in season so that the ground will yield its fruit.
God sits in the car with his daughter as she drives.
God holds his little one close as she shivers by the window.
God puts the thought of taking some photos into the father’s head. He knows how much his son will want to look at them in the months to come.
God walks with the old man to his front door, his arm around his shoulder.
God reminds the nice lady that even though she will get wet, the old man is waiting. He whispers the thought of stopping for milk on the way.
God stands rejoicing with the farmer over the fact that the grass will grow again.
God kneels by the toddler still strapped into his car seat - he is crying, but he is all right. God walks by his mother, injured but alive, as the paramedics put her in the ambulance.


Drops of God’s life-giving presence sink into each cracked, gasping life and heart that has almost surrendered in hopelessness. He hopes that one day, each one will know that He was there.


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This article has been read 1139 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Debbie Sickler10/26/05
Wow! This was really unique in style! Maybe some people really were speechless after reading! :) I loved how each story was told in only a line or two, yet you described them in such detail. I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks!
Cassie Memmer10/27/05
I also enjoyed this unusual tale. Each little perfect slice. Loved those windshield wipers! If only each of us could really know how often God is by our side! I'd love to see more of things like this, okay?
Lynda Lee Schab 10/27/05
Very creative entry! I liked the bits and pieces of various lives and the way you showed that God is watching over them, desiring to draw each one to Himself.
Well done!
Blessings, Lynda
Karen Ward10/27/05
I enjoyed this too. Each storyline so succinct, but enough to give us a real feeling for the situation. The old man made me cry...well done.
terri tiffany10/27/05
This was a geat way of telling the story! I could see each scene with each different person so vividly..and the way you tied it all together at the end was really well done!
Jan Ackerson 10/27/05
I really loved this--you portrayed in a wonderful way how God can use circumstances. I think one way to clear up a slight bit of confusion would be to put each person's vignette in one paragraph only. Then your reader is clearer when the stories are switching. Very tenderly written.
Anita Neuman10/27/05
You gave us just enough insight into each character to really suck us in emotionally. Great job! And a beautiful summation at the end, too.
Shari Armstrong 10/28/05
Very nice - I like the pictures of how God is always there -in the good and the bad.
Val Clark10/29/05
WOW! How did you manage to write such an AWESOME piece? Every word was a drop of exquisite perfection in the raindrops of life. :-) Sorry, couldn't resist! Yeggy
Amy Michelle Wiley 10/29/05
I really liked this! Facinating style.
Linda Watson Owen10/29/05
Ahh...this prose is full of poetry! Beautiful!
Garnet Miller 10/30/05
A beautiful story. God wants to be present in each of our lives in every way. Since the devil is in the details, we need to make sure that we listen for that still small voice as we endeavor to keep God "in the loop" on every area of our lives. Then, we can truly praise Him for all that He has done:)
Debbie OConnor11/01/05
Sally, this is a stunner. I love it. I wish I had read it sooner, but I'm glad I got to it now. Great work!