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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Experiment (02/16/12)

TITLE: Jealousy Wins (And Everyone Loses)
By Wilma Schlegel


It was only a game, an experiment just to see what she’d do. She wants everyone to think she’s such a good ‘Christian’. Who wouldn’t be able to be all goody-goody when they have everything going for them like she does?

Here’s what we did. (You’ll see how harmless it was.)

We take turns hosting our family get-togethers. The host provides the main part of the meal and everyone else brings a dish to contribute. Ho-hum, I know. Well I thought wouldn’t it be fun to ‘wow’ our sister Carly’s dishes, whatever they are, and then to not even notice or recognize or taste Kathy’s! Everybody thought it would be great. How long would it take her to notice and ‘what would Kathy do’?

Well, it was more fun than I ever expected. The first few times she didn’t seem to notice or mind. She’d actually agree with us and ask Carly for her recipes! (LOL!) But after a few times I’d notice the hurt look in her eyes and the way she’d get really quiet. (Oh - cry me a river - she has everything in life handed to her while the rest of us have to actually work for a living.)

And at the next get-together, she’d try harder! Beautiful.

So ... we started trying harder.

I remember the Easter that she and Carly both made pineapple dishes. Carly made pineapple filling and Kathy made something like ambrosia. I really had to hand it to my brother Larry that day. He took a look at Kathy’s ambrosia and asked, “What in the world is that?” At the same time I asked Kathy to pass me some more of Carly’s filling. Told her I loved it.

Another time we were at Kathy’s. She made these skewers on the grill. We didn’t touch them and she had to change up the whole menu. Went to the store for burgers and rolls. Who knows who she fed all those skewers to?

And that reminds me of the last time we were at my place. I told Kathy that I was out of dog food. I picked up the appetizer she’d brought and plopped half of it right into the dog bowl and asked her, “You don’t mind do you? Nobody’s eating this anyway.”

She cried that day. She asked me why, too. “What did I ever do to you?” is what she asked. I didn’t give her an answer, what was I going to say? But I told her I wouldn’t do it anymore.

I guess that should have been it - the end of the experiment. Funny thing was - I couldn’t stop. You know why? She’s got the nice-paying job, the nice house in a good neighborhood. Well I’ve got one thing she’ll never get. I’m the life of the party, always will be.

So, Kathy doesn’t come around anymore. I hear she even went for counseling. It doesn’t seem to have helped her,though. I mean, this is what we do, it’s part of who we are. If she’s such a good Christian, shouldn’t she be turning the other cheek or something?

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This article has been read 340 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 02/23/12
Wow you really touched me with this. It's amazing how a pack mentality can turn cruel and vicious so fast. At first, I wasn't sure I liked the notes in the parentheses but then I realized the MC was really trying to talk herself into believing that. Nice fresh take on the topic.
C D Swanson 02/23/12
Oh my this was quite the read, it made me wince! The story itself was well written and an original take on the topic.

This reminded me of a company picnic. Everyone ignored one employees dish because she wasn't well liked. It broke my heart...I of course ate most of her entree` and it made her day.

Good job...Thanks for this.
This was an excellent tale of what emotional and mental abuse can do to someone.

God Bless~
Theresa Santy 02/27/12
I'd like to begin by saying this was written well and had a good message. However, I'm not a fan of reading from the point of view of the villian, unless the villian has some sort of transformation, or at least, some glimmer of hope of transformation, before the end of the story.

It's a personal preference, which says nothing against your writing, and I have no idea what the general consensus is on this.

But you are absolutely correct, when jelousy wins, everybody loses.
Hiram Claudio02/28/12
I think of the comments so far, Theresa said it best. It can be different to read a story from the viewpoint of the villan or from "not the hero." Having said that ... I thought this was brilliant! Since it is difficult to read, I believe its as difficult to write in such a way that it gets read. This held my interest to the end.

And I think another thing it accomplished was that it made you loathe, with each effort to get back at Kathy, the MC. I found myself liking her less and less and feeling for Kathy more and more.

Very well done!
Leola Ogle 02/29/12
It always amazes me when people do acts of cruelty under the guise of "it's all in fun!" This was well written and causes one to reflect if we've ever been guilty of this behavior! Good job with this one! God bless!
Noel Mitaxa 03/01/12
You backed up your title so comprehensively and convincingly. Well done, because you have not made your MC a heroine.
Hiram Claudio03/01/12
Congratulations on a well deserved 1st place finish!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 03/01/12
Congratulations. I really liked this and thought it was great to see a fresh POV
annie keys03/01/12
CONGRATULATIONS on first place! Great story!
C D Swanson 03/01/12
Congratulations on your well deserved blue first place ribbon. Nicely done...I look forward to your next entry.

God Bless you~
Leola Ogle 03/01/12
Congrats Wilma! God bless!
Donna Wilcher03/01/12
Congratulations!!! Well done!
Nancy Bucca03/01/12
Oh, wow, I found myself so angry at the MC! You made quite a point with this, a well deserved first place if I ever saw one. Congratulations.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 03/03/12
Congratulations for your blue ribbon in level 3 and for ranking 15th overall!