The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 425 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
02/17/12
Oh, this is so sweet. I love it.

A typo here, and there, but nothing major. Also, this part "colors that clash against the blue-gray war zone where children soldiers fight enemies inside their own bodies." didn't strike me as something a child would think or say. The rest of it seemed to fit, though.

Stories like this always make me sad, but they remind me of the amazing children who fight this battle every day.
Beautifully told as an inside view from a child's perspective. I liked the contrast with the superficiality of 17 magazine.
02/19/12
An amazing story with a grim reminder of how many children/people face this insidious battle.

Great descpritions and metaphors. Appreciated the struggling "younger healthy friend" who didn't want to go, yet knew it was the right thing to do in the end.

Very creative...well written. Thank you.

God Bless~
Congratulations for ranking 10th in level 4 and 14th overall!