The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
01/27/12
Oh, this was splendid.

I loved this: "They concede to the supremacy that is their collective existence."

And that you took this theme and carried it through the piece. Non fiction pieces tend to struggle in these challenges, but I have high hopes for this one.

Because it's simply beautiful.
01/27/12
Beautifully written, and beautiful message. I really enjoyed this. Great job!
God Bless~
01/27/12
I love that "harmonize" and "in concert" - I enjoyed this so much! Thanks for sharing. God bless!
01/28/12
How lovely is your writing and the message you portrayed. I love the opening line; it actually caused me to stop reading at lightening speed and take my time. You really hit the topic on the head in such a gentle way. Well done.
01/31/12
Helen described your piece beautifully. It is very "lovely" and I, too, slowed down to savor it's message.
01/31/12
My favorite line was:
"Conceding is not giving up who you are but admitting who you aren’t." That seemed to wrap it all up for me.

Had to read some sentences over a couple times to understand exactly what you were saying. Perhaps just a bit of "polish" would help smooth out a few places.

Overall nice job! Pleasant piece with a good reminder for us all.



Congratulations for placing 8th in level 3!