The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/17/11
This was very true and I enjoyed it entirely - from beginning to the end. Clever way of bringing the topic to the fore.

God Bless~
I like how you pray for the people you deliver to. The analogy you made is an interesting one. Some may find it a little off topic but you made a good effort. I enjoyed your message and you left me with things to think about.
11/21/11
This is an interesting piece. I always love it when personal experience is woven into a challenge entry.

So it might not surprise you that the section that grabbed my heart and attention was the anecdote, where you explained your experience as a fruit and veg driver. In future nonfiction entries, I'd would move such an anecdote the very top of the article.

(Also, check out "Jan's Writing Basics" in the "Writing" section of the forums. Scroll to an older lesson, and you will find fantastic tips for nonfiction challenge entries.)