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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Blog (10/20/11)

TITLE: If Solomon Were a Blogger
By Wilma Schlegel
11/02/11


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“Martha, hey!! Guess what? Justin, the boy I was tutoring in Math? He aced his test! That boy’s going places, I just know it! Martha? You home?” Mary slings her jacket over the back of the nearest chair and drops her purse on the table. “No pots and pans like I used to hear, just the little clicks and dings of your latest obsession. What’s this new interest in the computer recently?”

“Oh, Hi Mary. Look at this great blog site I found! It’s got advice...answers” Martha just barely takes her eyes off the computer to answer her sister.

Mary shrugs and is just about to leave the room. “Oh I didn’t know you were into self-help.

“I’m not, at least I don’t think I am - this is different. It’s the kind of stuff you and our mutual friend got me into. You should take a look” Martha explains, this time actually looking at Mary.

Mary frowns and moves close enough to read the beginning of the blog entry.

“My son, friends and all visitors, I’ve got much to tell you, wisdom to help develop self-control and to aid you in becoming people of discernment.”

“I don’t know Martha, this could be some weirdo trying to brainwash people. My students fall for this kind of thing, too. Just step away from that blog site and - did you make dinner? I’m starved..”

“Of course I did - it just needs to be warmed up. Kind of like you,” she nudges her sister. “Read more - give it a chance, won’t you?”

“My tip today is from chapter 22 of my book, ‘Do not move an ancient boundary stone set up by your forefathers.’ Consider this and let me know your thoughts.”

Mary shakes her head. “This is the kind of stuff you’re reading? What’s that got to do with anything? We’re not going to be moving any ancient boundary stones any time soon, or ever. Now, can we eat?”

“Alright, alright, but I thought you liked discussions. This is an interactive blog. You should see the ideas that get tossed around.” Martha has thrown her hands in the air almost smacking her sister in her outburst.

Mary jerks herself away from Martha’s hand and slams her own hand down on the mouse, by accident, to regain her balance. Some responses pop into view on the screen.

Renee: “I’d like to know how this applies to me today. It isn’t possible for me to move an ancient boundary stone.”

Jeanette: “Well maybe not an actual ancient boundary stone, but we all know if you move a boundary to widen your own borders that would be a form of theft .”

Mike: “Could there be a broader application? Like for instance look what’s happened to Sunday. Here’s the ancient boundary stone - ‘Remember the Sabbath to keep it holy.’ We’ve moved it just a little every time we’ve filled our Sabbath hours with activities which our ancestors never would have done on a Sunday.”

“Wow, this Mike guy has a different perspective.” Mary says. “But, what’s the big deal?”

“It looks like he wrote more.” Martha points at the screen.

Mike: “Little by little we’ve made Sunday like any other day of the week. Every time we squeeze something into our schedule, we have less time to spend with the Lord. We don’t have time to fellowship, we drift away. And it’s a commandment to keep it holy. Don’t move the ancient boundary stone.”

Jeanette: “I think I have another example. How about lying? The ancient boundary stone is that we’re not supposed to lie. I think lying causes more hurt and ruined relationships than just about anything else.”

At this point, Mary’s hooked. She is almost pushing Martha out of her chair. “This site is too cool. How do I post a comment? I need to tell them that each of the commandments could be seen as an ancient boundary stone.”

“That’s awesome Mary. I knew you had a mind for this kind of thing. It’s like the stuff He taught us, isn’t it? Hey, look at this! When you’re done with your comment look at the next tip Solomon posted - What were you saying earlier about Justin going places?

“Also from chapter 22 of my book, consider this: Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will serve before kings, not before obscure men.” Solomon

__________________________________
Bible verses: Proverbs 22:28,29; New International


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Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 11/03/11
I like this fresh approach about the words of wisdom from the Bible. It's a great way to deliver the message to the kids. I like that you added the comments too.

You had just a few errors with punctuation, a missing quotation mark, comma, and the - felt a bit distracting to me.

I thought your start was great. It made me want to keep reading. The conclusion was satisfying and made me smile.
CD Swanson 11/09/11
I loved this! Nicely done! It held my attention and I really like when passages are throughout the story. I loved the ending! God Bless~
Noel Mitaxa 11/09/11
Very creative approach, though the constant present tense (for me) suggests it would work well as a play, with action bracketed or italicised.
I like how you have built the interest as you progress.
Leola Ogle 11/10/11
Loved it! Good job! God bless!
Cheryl von Drehle 11/10/11
In an effort to critique along suggested lines: Strong start…well crafted with believable dialog. I was actually a little distracted by the names Mary and Martha, thinking you were going somewhere with that (maybe you did and I missed it.) Good treatment of the topic, not only as an example of a blog, but how blogs draw us in. Love the application of Proverbs. I would like to see you do more with the ending. I felt it just sort of ended without any kind of a climax or twist. I’m not sure that the “sub-plot” about Justin really works…maybe, but if so, needs to be stronger. Overall: creative, and an entertaining read with a valuable message.
Edmond Ng 11/15/11
An interesting take on the topic using Mary and Martha as characters for the story. In ancient times, Sabbath was on the seventh day, not on Sunday, which is the first day of the week or the Lord's Day. I agree that these days many of us fill our dedicated day for the Lord "with activities which our ancestors never would have done." Our schedules are always squeezed and we have so little time for God. Your story is a good reminder of the need for us to pursue wisdom, and to set aside time for the Lord, not just on Sundays, but every day of our lives. Nicely written piece. God bless.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 11/17/11
Congratulations for ranking 8th in your level!