“You called, Most High Excellency, oh AOG?” Bowing before a synthetic throne, afraid a smile might erupt by glancing at the brick replacing a missing imitation gold leg.
“Yes, my little minions. I’ve created yet another mind numbing, time wasting media which will seem indispensable to those humans who believe they can’t live without it. A meddling journal marvel for my invention: the computer.”
“Oh, great AOG, we are humbled at your imagination.” How many times will he take credit for inventing the computer? The minions wonder.
“This is why I, and only I, am the Author Of Gibberishness! In honor of this great accomplishment I am assigning you two insignificants to come up with a name for this sensation of mine. Mine, you understand, it’s mine, so the name must reflect that I am the author, an angel in disguise, robber of men’s destiny, entrapper of their desire to actually do something constructive, warper of creativity, grouper of those who have nothing better to do, master of…well, master of something and I’ll think of it here shortly. In the mean time, you two pathetic little gremlettes get busy as I have other gibberishness to think up. Move! And make sure ‘you know who’ knows it came from me.”
With heads low as if bowing (but really trying not to laugh), they slowly make their way out – backwards.
The slamming of the doors hides their giggles, “Did you peek at his ‘throne’?”
“No, did you?”
“Nope and we’d better come up with a name that’s good or else we’ll get it again.”
“I know. I almost puked when he made us eat angel food cake last time.”
“Oh, don’t mention it. I was so dizzy I thought I saw a halo over your head.”
“GET BUSY AND STOP GIGGLING OUT THERE.”
Stifled chuckles and snorts, in unison.
“Okay, what names have we made up so far that Mr. Angel Of Gibberishness likes so well?”
“How about the ‘five inch floppy’?”
Fingers point at each other and hands cover their mouths.
“Don’t forget the time you were coughing so hard and the term‘hacking’ was born?”
“Remember Sexting, I think that was our greatest,” as high fives are shared,
“Well, what are we going to do this time?”
“Perhaps something that rhymes with AOG’s name? Like OG?”
“That’s a good idea. Let’s start at the top of the alphabet and see if we can come up with something. You go first.”
“No, you go first.”
“It was my idea, you go first.”
“Hmm, let’s get the chart out since neither of us knows our ABD’s.”
“A is first. ‘A’ what?”
“How about rhyming it with his name? Let’s call it AOG.”
“AOG. That sounds good. Let’s tell him.”
“Hey, wait a minute. AOG is his title!”
“Oh, yea. Well, let’s go with the next letter. What is it?”
“B: ‘BOG’, that will work, won’t it?”
“BOG sounds slow. Something faster how about (glancing at chart)…COG?”
“COG? That’s a real work of art, you dummy. Let’s go with (another glance at chart)…DOG.”
“’DOG’? Who’s the dummy here anyway?”
Both study the chart, “E’s next. EOG, that sounds familiar. Oh yes, Executive of Grief. Whoa, we don’t want to make him mad!”
“Right, okay F: FOG, no, that won’t do either.”
“G: GOG, isn’t that a name God judges?”
“Yea, I think so but don’t mention His Name again here. There maybe something listening and we’d be standing in from of EOG! Again!”
“Right, next is H: HOG. Hmm, HOG, that might work. What do you think?”
“Nay, IOG already has that one, remember?”
“I forgot, Idiots On Goldwings.”
“J’s next; JOG, I think I’ll run with that one.”
“We’ll both get our heads JOGGED if we don’t stop goofing around.”
“Okay, how ‘bout ‘K’? KOG?”
“No, sounds like COG. Let me see, L is next - LOG. That’s what they do to get on the computer yet we might be able to use it somehow though.”
So it goes through the night, as it is always night where the gremlette-minions live and work. They did make up a name that AOG liked: a four letter word. It has become popular but actually is beneficial to humans which caused AOG to appear before EOG to have his NOGGIN JOGGED with a real LOG to get his COGS moving because they were in a FOG and all BOGGED down according to EOG’s boss, MOG, the Minister Of GOG.
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