Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Search Engine (10/06/11)

TITLE: Search Engine Now!
By Tim Pickl
10/09/11


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

GULLIBER
Hi, my name is Gulliber. I has a dream. I wanna do more with my life. I wann be better at doin’ it….. Is dat good euf, Mah?

MAH
Why’d you stop? You were doin’ good. Now start over, just like we practiced.

GULLIBER
Start now?

MAH
Yeppers. Three… two… one…

GULLIBER
Hi, my name is Gulliber. I has a dream. I wanna do more with my life. I wann be better at doin’ it so… my Mah gits off my back, but I’m eaz-lee dee-stracted—

MAH
Cut! Cut! Whaddya sayin’ that fer, Gulliber?

GULLIBER
I dunno, Mah. It just kinda came out.

MAH
Okay, okay, we need to start again… watch me… three… two… one…

GULLIBER
Hi, my name is Gulliber. I has a dream. I wanna do more with my life. I wann be better at doin’ it, but I’m eaz-lee dee-stracted.. My greatest weakness is I trust everyone.

MAH
Good job, Gulliber!

GULLIBER
Awww, shucks, Mah.

MAH
Okay, now…the next part…. Two… one…

GULLIBER
Anywho, one evenin’ while I was relaxin’ and watchin’ my big tubey television—complete with a gov’ment issued converter box thingy—this big ol’ long commercial came on. They went on-an’-on talkin’ about how I could “Become a car mechanic in 30 days!”

MAH
Keep goin’…

GULLIBER
About the second time through, I was ready to calls dem up. So I did. I calls dem up an’ they put me on hold. Den some phone lady told me to check out their website for details. An’ I said, “Website? What’s a web-site?” Fine-lee a nice young thing came on the line, and I bought the whole car mechanic training thing for only $99.99. She was so nice an’ sent me two of them thingys for the price of one. I’ll give one to my cousin Gober for his birthday.

MAH
Keep goin’… We really wanna win this contest.

GULLIBER
Anywho, when I got the package the nex’ day I tore into it like a kid on Christmas mornin’. It was a couple-a engine manuals and a three DVDs, all in pretty packagin’. It said START HERE on one-a the DVDs, so I opened it up an’ put it in my DVD player. By the way, I thank God for my cousin Gober… he gave me a DBD player last Christmas. He calls ‘em DBD’s; I think he’s funny.

MAH
Good job Gulliber, yer on a roll now—the Mechanics Online judges will love this! Okay, keep goin’…

GULLIBER
A purdy filly dressed in pink Mechanic’s overalls appeared an’ told me we were gonna play a game called SEARCH ENGINE NOW. She sez, “Pick up the Basic Engine Manual. Now SEARCH ENGINE NOW for the Table of Contents.” So I openz the Manual an’ boom I finds it right away! Just like this.

MAH
That’s it—this is good, son. Let me zoom in on the Manual. Hold it right there…. Good. Okay…keep goin’.

GULLIBER
Next the purdy lady tells me, “SEARCH ENGINE NOW in the Table of Contents for Air Filter.” So I openz the Manual an’ boom I finds it right away! I sez to myself, “Hey I’m really gettin’ the hang o’ dis. I will be a mechanic in NO TIME.” Den I stopped the D“B”D—ha ha—and den it flashes on my T.V.: For more information check us out online using your favorite Search Engine today, such as Google. An’ I sez outloud this time, “What in the world is Google?” Mahhhh, is this Google thingy somethin’ like my cousin Gober does?

MAH
Cut! Cut! No, no, no. Google is a computer thing. Yer cousin likes to stare at folks—mostly you. That’s called “ogle”.

GULLIBER
Ohhh…. I see. I think. I think that’s all Gober knows how to do. Mr. Ogle. Ha ha.

MAH
Okay, okay. Let’s get this show on the road.

GULLIBER
Let’s get this road on the show. Ha ha!

MAH
All right Gull, that’s enuf-a that. You gotta tell the last part. Are you ready?

GULLIBER
Yes’m.

MAH
Two… one…

GULLIBLE
I wanted to find ask what in the world a Google was so I calls the purdy lady’s number on the screen. She answers and sez, “Thank you calling SEARCH ENGINE NOW, how may I help you today?” I sez, “Hey purdy lady, I got your DVD an’ I am wonderin’ ,what in the world is a Google?” an’ she
sez, “Why, it’s a SEARCH ENGINE NOW!”

MAH
Cut! Good job, Gulliber!


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 437 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 10/21/11
This had me chuckling. At first I thought you might be a tad off topic but you pulled it together. There were tines I had a hard time following thestory and had to reread. Butyou definitely painted me agreat picture with your dialog.
Leola Ogle 10/21/11
Too funny! Made me chuckle out loud! God bless!
Linda Goergen10/22/11
Unique and humorous use of the topic!
Lillian Rhoades 10/22/11
Using the suggested guidelines, I would like to make a few comments. (1) I thought you were on target with the topic, and did so in a creative way. (2) Your dialect threw me a bit, especially some of the spelling (Ma and Mah sounds the same), and I noticed a few areas where the dialect was not consistent. I think "an she sez...should probably begin with a capital letter. (3) I love how you tied the main character's name to the story with the use of Gulliber. (4) This was a humorous, and entertaining story, even though it lacked a memorable message and a strong conclusion. Perhaps, a better conclusion could be where we learn if Gulliber won the contest.

WArning: The above is solely the opinion of the commentator, and I bow to the opinion of the final Judges.:-)
Patricia Protzman10/22/11
Creative and humorous take on the topic. Dialogue has misspelled words and I had some difficulty following the story. I loved the MC's name.
CD Swanson 10/22/11
This was an entirely clever story, and right on topic. I enjoyed it. Thanks. God Bless~
Theresa Santy 10/22/11
Funny! You definitely have a knack for humor. I had a little trouble with the dialect. (This is a tricky beast to tame, I've tried it myself with limited success). What I've noticed from reading pieces from authors who know how to do this well -- they pick a select few words to alter for the dialect, just enough to let the flavor show.

Nice application of the topic!
Edmond Ng 10/24/11
An enjoyable read! I think the MC of your story still need to know what's a search engine in the end. Maybe he should Google to find out. LOL. Nice take on the topic.
Danielle King 10/25/11
This is clever, creative and bang on topic but I had trouble making sense of the unfamiliar dialect. Good job!