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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Crime and Punishment (not about the book) (07/21/11)

TITLE: “God Is Our Judge and the Verdict is…”
By CD Swanson
07/21/11


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“Hello I heard about you getting lambasted by the boss, tough break.”

Jim the office gossip was standing in the doorway of her office with a blue coffee mug in his hand, smiling.

“Hello Jim, of course you would be the first to regurgitate the alleged incident.” Vanessa replied.

“Well, when a Christian such as you, who is all about God, gets her can kicked in by the boss it gets around fast.” He smiled.

“Jim I wouldn’t put it as you so eloquently did.” She dripped in sarcasm and continued, “However, it was a misunderstanding and I am sure the crime will fit the punishment; and in this case I am positive God will come through and make this whole thing abundantly clear in no time at all.”

She took a bite of her sandwich and smiled into his face with ease and confidence that came from being so filled with the Spirit and armed with the Word of God; and who was so obviously not guilty of the crime that her boss accused her of.

“I hear you are finished and you may have to clear out of your office by days end…Is that true?” He could hardly contain his excitement.

“Jim I was told that if nothing new was brought in to support my innocence that I would have to leave the premises; so yes I may have to leave soon.”

Vanessa continued to enjoy her sandwich hardly showing any degree of discomfort or concern; it was unsettling to Jim who was the antithesis of what Vanessa represented as an employee, let alone a human being who loved God. Jim was a proud in your face atheist and loved mocking Vanessa every chance he could get about God.

“You should start packing we will miss you around here Vanessa.” Jim looked around her big corner office with a smile on his face and continued, “You did a lot for this organization and the people seem to love you, but after this, I hardly think you will be Saint Vanessa any longer.” He stood up, “Oh, and Vanessa, where is your God now?” He laughed and walked out.

Vanessa looked up to God and said in her mind, “God forgive him for he is walking in the flesh and reacting with a carnal mind.”

Jim and Vanessa were colleagues in the Assisted Living Facility. The owners loved Vanessa and she went from an intern to the CEO within five years, and earned every promotion given to her.

She loved the residents and enjoyed being a part of a facility that promoted the mental well-being of the residents. In fact, it was one big love fest between Vanessa and the residents; she made a point of visiting each one every day. Yes, all 45 residents each and every day where she would sit on their bed, holding their hand, or go into the recreation room and play a game of bingo with them. She really loved them and protected them by being a fierce advocate while lending them “voice” to anything that was important to their quality of life.

She heard a knock and looked up to see her boss Brady standing in the doorway, “May I enter please?” She nodded her head and motioned for him to sit down. “Vanessa we are looking into this embezzlement fiasco and we are pulling for you, but if nothing comes up we will have to dismiss you immediately, I just wanted to say I am so sorry.”

Meanwhile in an office opposite hers, Jim was smiling and packing his belongings knowing he was fully responsible for this outcome. He slaved for hours on end to make this embezzlement charge stick to Vanessa like glue so he could take the corner office, eventually utilizing his majority shareholder stocks to complete the “hostile takeover.” He smiled, almost salivating.

“Jim you are under arrest” He looked up to see an officer in his doorway. The officer began to read his Miranda rights as he placed the cuffs on him.

“What happened?” Vanessa asked the officer.

“Somehow this jerk linked into our system; we have all of the transactions he perpetrated on record. You are free of all charges. Someone up there likes you Miss, have a good day.”

Vanessa smiled and looked up to heaven and said, “Thank you Father…Please forgive Jim as he was thinking in the carnal mind.”

Outside Vanessa was being paged to come celebrate in the recreation room…


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Member Comments
Member Date
Brenda Shipman07/28/11
I liked the whole premise of your story, although it seemed a bit much to develop and resolve in 750 words. It would have been interesting to take the opposite approach and describe your main character's reaction if "justice" had not been accomplished. Several areas where you needed more commas. Loved Vanessa's heart for the residents - you did a great job describing that. Enjoyed reading this. Keep writing, and bless you as you do! :)
Linda Goergen08/03/11
I like this - the way Vanessa kept trusting God in the face of humiliation and injustice, the way Jim’s secret crime was brought to light - I thought it flowed well and I enjoyed the read!