The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Loved the dialogue! And the names...Journal, Elm, Boone! Very unique! Hope Colby found his plot of land! Good story! God bless!
Your story reminded me of youth's eternal search to find that beautiful valley.
The dialogue is homely and one feels the genuine warmth of the family.

'I'd have to (loan) lend you...'

"Elm's grown," he (mused?)
'Mused' doesn't seem to fit in this context.

An enjoyable read.
Interesting take on the challenge and you’ve captured a heart-warming family scene with much vision and entertaining detail and your dialog and setting and quaint name choices seem to fit perfectly the place and time. Good job bringing this to life!
Love this, very original and well-written! I got visions of Waltons re-runs I've watched, but picked up on the name Boone immediately, so I was glad it ended the way it did. Would love to read more of this story, great job on the dialogue too.
You have set the scene for a whole bunch of chapters, and I am looking forward to seeing them emerge.