The Official Writing Challenge
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This story is also unique and intriguing...and captivating as you give dramatic visual image to the unseen!
I love the way you presented this look at spiritual warfare! Great Job!
Oh, I like this a lot.

One very small bit of "red ink." I wouldn't have capitalized "Their." I would have kept it lower case, since you already capitalized the individual names.

I like how you came full circle at the end, repeating that opening line. It gave it a nice sense of closure.
I believe you chose the right name for the General. I too like the way you ended with the lines with which you began.
Very poetic piece. Well done:)
A great picture of the battle for our hearts.
Very poetic imagery, with a panoramic setting. I wonder if you might also highlight the attractive way in which evil parades itself; for if we saw its ultimate ugliness right off the bat, we would not so easily succumb to it.
The personifications of evils make for a very interesting and thought-provoking story.
Wow! You gave me chills. This is a very powerful message.

Congratulations for placing 8th in level 3!
wow! powerful writing and great word pictures. i could imagine the scene unfolding and this is enhanced but the descriptive flavour of the piece. This did mean i felt like an observer/fly on the wall rather than becoming
engaged with the story.
I think you could have jazzed up the title a little as it did not quite seem to match the tone (in my opinion anyway) Bang on the theme of war and peace and it was Lord of the Ringsian :-) in its telling.