The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/16/11
Oh wow! I thought your story was really good and then you turned it around and made it really personal. Wow! Now I'm speechless:)
06/16/11
Not that it's not still really good, let me clarify that! It's a very good story. It's just that you turned it around and made it excellent. You opened it up to carry it on to another level. Wow!
06/17/11
The dialog sounds so real throughout this piece as exchanges are made between the family members. The ending left me with this question--why is the mother keeping Andrew a secret from her children--did she give him up as un unwed mom in her younger years. . .or?
You set the bait and I'm biting. I'll wait for this to be continued in another entry.
06/23/11
Excellent story, though the significance of the flashback slid past me on first reading. There's a lot packed into the 750-word limit, and chapter two is not far away, I hope.