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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Minute(s) (as in time) (03/03/11)

TITLE: You're Mine
By Kellie Henningsen


There was once an energetic four-year old girl. Her days were filled with dolls, coloring books, and endless playing. But at night time, when her energy was gone, she would pile books up on the couch, look at her mom and say, ďMommy? Can you read to me?Ē

And her mom, with dishes to do, laundry to fold, and dust she could write in, would look at her little girl and smile from the inside out. She would take a deep breath, sit down on the couch, and say:

For just a few minutes
For just a short time
Iíll stop what Iím doing
Iím thankful youíre mine

Time flew by as it always does and the little girl grew right along with it. It wasnít long before she was ten years old. Her room emptied of all things Barbie and filled with Justin Bieber posters and Hannah Montana paraphernalia. But at night, when the day was finally settled, she would come to her mom and ask, ďMom, are you busy? Can you play a game with me?Ē

And her mom, with paperwork piling up, events to organize, and lunches to pack, would look at her growing girl and smile from the inside out. She would take a deep breath, sit down right beside her, and say:

For just a few minutes
For just a short time
Iíll stop what Iím doing
I love that youíre mine

Before long, the mother grew grey hairs at a rapid rate. Music blared through her house. Boys called frequently. And shopping trips to the mall no longer included her. But on rare occasions her daughter would come to her and quietly say, ďMom? I need to talk.Ē

And when she did, her mom, tired from chauffeuring, catering, and cleaning, would look at her daughter and smile from the inside out. She would take a deep breath, hold her daughterís hands, and say:

Iíve got many minutes
Iíve got lots of time
You need my attention
And for now, youíre just mine

This daughter grew up good. She was loved by many and especially by one. The big day came and her mother watched as she walked down the aisle. When the day was all done, her daughter came to her and said,

Mom. Thanks for the moments.
And thanks for the times.
Weíll have many more.
Just of a different kind.

Her motherís heart swelled with pride as she smiled from the inside out at this daughter of hers.

In later years, disease struck far too early and the motherís health began to fail. As her time shortened and her future looked grim, her daughter came to her and said, ďMom, can we talk like old times?Ē

And her mother, with pain in her chest, pills by her bed, and coughing hurting her so, smiled from the inside out and said,

Iíve not many minutes
Iíve not too much time
But what I have left
Is just yours and mine

Her daughter stayed by her bed until the wee hours of the morning.

A few days after the funeral, a note was found in the motherís home addressed to the daughter. With trembling hands the daughter opened the note and read:

I loved every minute
I loved all the times
We chatted together
Sweet daughter of mine

Now that daughterís little boy comes to her often as well. With beautiful blue eyes, he looks up at her and asks, ďMom can you play catch with me?Ē And that daughter, with dishes to do, laundry to fold, and dust she can write in, looks at her sweet little boy, smiles from the inside out, and says:

For as long as you want
For as long as we can
Iíd love to play with you
That's always my plan

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This article has been read 508 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Henry Clemmons03/10/11
Bravo. I'm not comparing this to any other entry I have read, but this really touched me and I thought it was very well done, and I hope it does very well because it is just one of those pieces that can stand by itself. Great job.
Robyn Burke03/10/11
Pure poetry. Just the right amount of sweetness.
Margaret Kearley 03/11/11
Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. I loved this.
Verna Cole Mitchell 03/12/11
What a way to tell a story! Wonderful!
Bonnie Bowden 03/12/11
Excellent job of mixing prose within the story. The mother and daughter's relationship was wonderfully portrayed.

This is definitely one of my top favorites for the week.
Kimberly Russell03/13/11
I really, really liked this. Not only the style but the content and meaning behind it. Well done.
Cathryn Hasek03/14/11
Wonderfully written! I enjoyed how the poem was different throughout the life stages of the characters. I really thought it was neat that the daughter ended up having a boy...just made me wonder if his walls would be plastered with sports heroes!
Rachel Phelps03/15/11
Wonderful! The format and message are so masterfully entwined.
Beth Muehlhausen03/15/11
Very sweet, and a legacy every mother would be proud to share. ;-)

Ann Grover03/16/11
This could be a children's book. Puts me in mind of Robert Munsch's "Love You Forever." Beautiful and well-done.
Michael Throne03/16/11
This is wonderful. It needs to be published. Well done!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 03/16/11
This is beautiful. Instead of reading it I heard a beautiful comforting lullaby or song inmy mind. I think with some tweaking you could turn this into an awesome song.
Carol Penhorwood 03/19/11
I too immediately thought of "love You Forever" ...one of my favorites.