Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Time-consuming (02/24/11)
TITLE: Captain Cliche
By Tim Pickl
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Kellie: Thank you so much Captain Cliché for taking the time to do this interview today.
Captain: Okay Kellie, I find the whole process of interviewing to be very time consuming; and time is of the essence, so please, Kellie let’s get on with it.
Kellie: Okay, then... first question: Why do you have a fascination with clichés?
Captain: I have a guiding light inside of me—a core philosophy—where I discern writers taking in garbage, and then writing it.
Kellie: Please elaborate.
Captain: Garbage in, garbage out. It’s really that simple. Keep it simple, stupid. For me, I tend to be a generalist jack of all trades, unlike my fellow FaithRiders who specialize in one form of writing or another.
Kellie: So, then why aren’t you called General Cliché? LOL
Captain: LOL! I never thought of that way. Very good Kellie, very good—I will have to remember that one.
Kellie: Next question: For hundreds of years, English Teachers all around the world back home on earth and out here on Mars have strictly banned the use of clichés, yet writers still fall into the trap of using them. What is your mission, Captain Cliché?
Captain: My mission, Kellie, knock on wood, is to be an extreme example to all writers that the monkey see, monkey do attitude in writing is fruitless and a complete waste of time. See, Kellie, monkeys don’t get published, inspired writers do.
Kellie: Ha! Excellent, excellent. What is your favorite cliché, or the clichés you see the most?
Captain: The real McCoy of cliché’s always rears its ugly head when bright-eyed and bushy tailed writers first start out. Time and time again I see clichés just jumping out from a story or poem like a sore thumb. I can smell a cliché a mile away. When the going gets tough, the tough get going—I warn the writer about these over used phrases—and tell them to “get going” away from clichés like the plague.
Kellie: What do you tell a writer—especially a FatihRider—whom you find using clichés?
Captain: I tell ‘em, “Hey, birds of a feather flock together and writing this garbage gets your piece tossed into the recycle bin, yep, just like garbage. So quit consuming time just to consume time. Make a difference by being the difference. Write something unique.”
Kellie: Excellent advice. What would you say to your critics who say you are setting a bad example?
Captain: I would say, “Mr. Critic, what example are YOU setting, and what difference are YOU making in all these young writers lives?” That usually shuts them up.
Kellie: Since we are talking about critics, what advice do you give writers regarding critics—those who comment on their works?
Captain: Excellent question.
Kellie: Thank you.
Captain: Critics are all talk and no action. Their bark is worse than their bite. For the most part, ignore them. However, there are those true critics who will critique, make suggestions and/or corrections to your work. Do listen to those people in your life, because they care.
Kellie: So, Captain Cliché, do you care?
Captain: Oh yes, Kellie, I care very much. I do what I do out of love. God’s love in me motivates me to strive and help in any way I can, every day.
Kellie: Can you give me an example?
Captain: Sure. We had a new group of FaithRiders arrive here on Mars recently, and during the initial testing, I noticed a very promising young lady who was willing to learn. She fell into the cliché trap, just like almost every writer does, but she was different. She stood up one beautiful Mars morning in one of my Captain Cliché classes and announced, “Please listen to this man—he is really trying to help us, seriously.” I was impressed.
Kellie: That young lady was me.
Captain: And I am so proud of all the things you have accomplished in such a short time. This blog is just one of your many talents. You are doing and will do great things in your life.
Kellie: Now you’re making me cry… I appreciate your kind words…
Where did you get the Captain’s uniform?
Captain: They recently changed the FaithRiders colonial officer’s uniforms, and one of the old ones happened to fit, and they let me keep it. :)
Kellie: Any last words today, Captain Cliché?
Captain: Keep putting your best foot forward.
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