The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
I loved that the teenager was fighting for her independance, yet she cried out to God. I also loved the stuffed animal, and how it never phased her that it was a symbol of her younger days.
Interesting way you’ve presented Halle’s diary entries, thoughts and actions. It was a bit unsettling to read it that way but I think that actually helped me feel what Halle was experiencing.
Very profound opening that held my attention to the end. Good story telling. I enjoyed it.
A good read- very realistic. I liked how you showed the ambivalence that comes with growing up...or at least wanting to. Good job.
Awesome entry! The diary format really works here, and the count-down idea was creatively written.
very interesting and can totally relate, as I'm 19
Great piece. I like the mix of little girl/grown woman and how she sometimes betrays herself. And isn't this the eternal adolescent struggle? Distancing ourselves, but not wanting to at the same time? Well done.
This tug of war could play out at many different ages and transitions. It makes this piece very relatable. At first I thought she might sound too mature in the way she talks and she probably is for most teenagers, but she sounds a lot like my youngest daughter. Old and young at the same time. Maybe a stretch for many girls this age but by my own experience not impossibly so. Great job!
Very creative entry. Well done.
You entered a teenager's mind brilliantly - I think many of us will identify - either with our own experience, memories or as a parent! Well done. Great writing.
Was that "kaleidescope" or shoul it be 'Collide"-escope? I love how you have captured - or at least cornered - the everywhere at once nature of a teenage thought process. Loved the gentle humour as well.
Your take on this was wonderful. I did a similar story about a boy not wanting to grow up. 18 is such a difficult age. It feels like you're hanging in limbo between child and adult. I love had you used the stuffed zebra, it was a great symbol.
I liked the view into Halle's mind here. There was a lot left unresolved in this story, which I both liked and disliked. As a not-so-long-ago college student myself, I relate to the grown-up but still a kid feeling. Nicely done.
Congratulations for placing 9th in level 3 and 27th overall!