The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
12/24/10
We just never know what divine appointment awaits us and your MC handled hers beautifully. Very well-written and thought provoking.
Excellent descriptions. Good job drawing the reader in. Thanks!
On topic with a good message. The last sentence, it seems to me, could be attributed to either Mary or Carly. Perhaps that is the way you intended it.
12/26/10
Good story. Great descriptions. Realistic characters and a light enjoyable read. Thanks for sharing.
Great story and I could feel the MC's bad mood.

Loved this description of Mary...

"Her shabby coat of undetermined color is frayed at the cuffs and gapes from several missing buttons. Graying hair peeps out from under a scarf tied securely under her whiskered chin."

I can "see" her and, uh..."smell" her.

Great story and great lesson!
Excellent story that pinches the reader's conscience just a little. I loved seeing the mc's fluctuating moods and then her heart revealed.
12/29/10
Ah, this is a good one. I wouldn't mind it continuing on to see where these two characters end up. It was a fun read, I enjoyed it, especially the different transitions between the MC's mood. Really good characterization.
God has many plans and purposes for our lives. It's amazing how a smile and a kind word can make someone's day and you never know just how far or how much good that random act of kindness might go. Thank you for such a beautiful message.
Congratulations for placing in the top 15 of your level and the top 20 overall!