The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
12/04/10
An intriguing story. I had some difficulty in working out who was speaking and hence quite how the story was developing. But I liked your opening lines and I found myself looking forward with anticipation to hearing what the woman had done.
12/05/10
You are opening up some deep material here that a 750-word limit can struggle to accommodate. I also found it difficult to follow the flow of conversations, but see the space restrictions as the major culprit.
You have the genesis of a much larger story that will invite your readers into your insights and into the world of some very diverse and volatile characters.
I wish I could read more of the story. I think I understood that Sam was the person who killed her 4 children but I wasn't 100% sure. You did a good job describing the setting and the mood. I just want to keep reading!
12/06/10
Ooh, sort of an Alfred Hitchcock sort of story. Eerie with a great line of characters.