Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Cyber Communication (email, IMís, etc) (11/04/10)
TITLE: Thanks for Being My Mentor
By Laurie Glass
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Thanks, Lisa. The truth is that I've really struggled the last few days, and I was kind of embarrassed to get in touch with you because of that. I know you're my mentor, and I can be honest with you, but I was still afraid you would be disappointed in me. I've done well since we've started e-mailing, and I didn't want to let you down.
As far as my homework assignment, I'm stuck on that. Listing the statements from the eating disorder voice is easy, but thinking of truthful statements for verses to counteract them is harder than I expected. It's especially hard to think of what to put down for "You're worthless" and "You'll never recover". I really don't feel like a person of value, and I can't imagine that I'll ever actually recover.
I'm sorry. I wish I was doing better.
Oh goodness, Maggie, there's no need to apologize. This mentoring relationship is about your recovery, and I'm here to walk with you during the challenging times as well as to celebrate your victories with you. Yes, you have done very well since we've started e-mailing, but the recovery process is full of ups and downs, sideways steps, falls, bruises, scrapes and any number of setbacks. Although difficult, these are all very normal things to experience during recovery. Therefore, you have nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to be embarrassed about when you experience these things. I am not here to judge you, so I can't be disappointed in you. Do you want to share what you've been struggling with this week?
Let me encourage you with that homework assignment. As far as your worth, please remember that it isn't rooted in the voice that you hear, not in what you think of yourself, and not in what others think of you, but in what God says about you. He created you in His image, and he has some pretty special things to say about you. In John 1:12, He declares you His child. He says, in 1 Cor. 6:17, that you are one with Him in spirit. In Christ, you are complete, according to Col. 2:9-10. There's more, but I encourage you to start by meditating on these verses. If you didn't have worth in God's eyes, why would He say these things about you? Since He created you in His own image, how can you have no value? You do have worth through the God who made you.
The voice that says you'll never recover is also a lie. I'm sure it feels that way sometimes, but recovery really is possible. Remember that God gave you a spirit of power (2 Tim. 1:7), and that you have strength through Jesus Christ (Phil. 4:13). It's there for the claiming.
Just so you know, I can relate to what you shared with me. I had such similar thoughts myself while I was anorexic. It isn't easy to combat that negative and degrading voice, but with prayer, discipline and consistency, it can be done.
Lisa, I could barely finish reading your e-mail through the tears in my eyes, but it really touched my spirit. Something really clicked that I can't quite explain at the moment, but I am eager to look up those Scriptures. As far as what I was struggling with this week, it seems so small now that it isn't worth mentioning. I'm exhausted tonight, so I will keep this short for now, but I am anxious to write more tomorrow. I have a sense of hope again! Thanks for being my mentor!
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