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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Writing a Letter (handwritten correspondence) (10/21/10)

TITLE: Neither Asteroids, Nor Shooting Stars
By Beth LaBuff


On the far-flung planet Alzene,
In the Trillox galaxy,
There dwelt a dazzling beauty
By the name of Astra-Zee.
Her epidermis—ecru
And her eye was aubergine,
Her hands were double-jointed
And she played the tambourine.

Through-out the past four light-years
She'd been pen-pals with a lad
Hailing from the gamma quadrant,
From the planet Capricad.
A consummate musician
Who could play the stringed sitar,
The gastropod named Wilbur
Was a cosmic superstar.

Wilbur sought to offer marriage
To his pen-pal, Astra-Zee,
So to make this thing transpire
He composed a marriage plea.
He utilized a space-o-gram,
His snail foot gripped the chalk
And from his heart his message gushed
To sway her to wedlock.

"Oh, my beloved Astra-Zee,
I miss your ecru skin
And your lovely eye of aubergine
Above your triple chin.
I'm writing you this letter
To request you be my wife.
This offer flows straight from my heart,
Please share my mollusk life."

"I, Wilbur, pledge thee, Astra-Zee,
My shell will be our home,
With tambourine and sitar,
Through the universe we'll roam."
And as he wrote he cleaned the page
Of slime and other smears.
The heart within the gastropod
Beat fast between his ears.

To validate his offer,
Wilbur threw in cosmic bling—
Placed carefully in the envelope
Was one of Saturn's rings.
A self-pat on his shell-back for
Remembering that detail,
He dropped the lumpy envelope
In the slot marked "Cosmic Mail."

The lumpy letter destined to
Receive a routing code,
But the ring inside jammed the machine,
'Bout made the thing explode.
Then a letter with a routing code
Was dispatched from the station—
Express to Trillox Galaxy,
Then to its destination.

The space-mail ship, upon its way,
Naught could impede or slow,
Inscribed upon the rocket-ship—
The deep-space mail motto—
"Neither asteroids, nor shooting stars,
Nor black hole residue,
Will stay this courier from its task—
The space-mail must go through!"

Now nowhere in this universe
Can there be heard the song
Of the tambourine and sitar!

That thought is just so wrong!
Take courage all you people,
Keep your chins up, bear your cross,
For the routing codes were bungled
And now we suffer loss.

Her letter with the mixed-up code
Was sent to a crustacean
On the distant planet Aesop
In the Cygnus constellation.
And the letter that she opened
Caused her eye to gleam in mirth,
'Twas a Notice of Eviction
Addressed: "Roswell — Planet Earth."

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This article has been read 1221 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Mona Purvis10/28/10
How do you do this? Just as creative and fun as can be. Truly out of the box, in fact it's out of the universe. Very good, indeed.

Rachel Phelps10/28/10
Fabulous creativity. I am in awe!
vincent lyons10/28/10
Wonderfully creative! What planet are you from!!lol.
Brenda Rice 10/29/10
Amazing, to say the least. Absolutely stunning from begin to end. Loved it.
Virgil Youngblood 10/29/10
Wonderfully over the rainbow!
Francy Judge 10/29/10
I agree. . . amazing, creative, and so much fun to read, and read again!
Verna Cole Mitchell 10/30/10
Your creativity is astonishingly wonderful. How in the world do you think of stuff like epidermus of ecru and eye of aubergine...I don't even know what the second one means! As always, I'm bowled over by the fun poems you write!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 10/31/10
You just amaze me with your talent. After reading, I sat here with my mouth hanging open and a fly flew in! Now that's poetic justice or something. You not only have a delightful sense of humor but the way you make your words flow and rhyme is simply marvelous!!
Gregory Kane10/31/10
I really don't know what to say! Even original seems too mild a term
Mariane Holbrook 10/31/10
This just left me speechless! I have no words to describe it, truly! But I was glued to it and ended up with my mouth dropping wide open at your creativity. Great, huge, big time Kudos!!
Sarah Heywood11/01/10
Amazing! I stand in awe of your masterful mind. So well done - this will definitely place, I'm sure!
Henry Clemmons11/02/10
Divergent mentation, no doubt. Cute, sweet, clever, entertaining, smart, artistic, imaginative x3, invetive and all wrapped up in a very skillfully developed and delivered package with an ending that soars above any complimentary vocabulary I possess. Great work.
Verna Cole Mitchell 11/04/10
Congratulations on another EC for your creative poem! So glad to see my twin in the bright lights!
Patricia Turner11/04/10
Beth, I'm starting a collection of your poetry. Your imagination and inventiveness are...what? I, like some of my fellow commentators lack the adequate words. Congratulations!
Carol Penhorwood 11/04/10
Another masterful creation from your pen! Congratulations! Your talent and imagination is off the charts!
Marita Thelander 11/04/10
Ah, Girlfriend, you crack me up. I can see your sly smile, and twinkle in your eye while you work through the writing process it must take to produce this type of wit. Such talent. Congratulations on your EC.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 11/04/10
Congratulations on your EC!
Joanne Sher 11/04/10
You're just amazing. Congrats, girl!
william price11/04/10
So much talent you have, Beth!!!!!!!!! Creative and artistic! Congrats on EC.
God bless.
Dianne Janak11/07/10
I havent been on here for a while but decided to check and see if you were still placing! SOOO not surprised Beth, but what I love about you is your humility and your ability to encourage others no matter where they are in their journey? Not only a gifted writer but a super woman... beautiful to know!
Nancy Sullivan 11/09/10
You make Sci-Fi fun. I may have to start reading it :) Great job.
Charla Diehl 11/11/10
Beth, God surely gifted you with a superbly creative mind and a wealth of words. Your poetic pieces delight, entertain and amaze me each and every time.