The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
You drew me right into Kip's story I empathized with him and hurt for his pain yet marveled for his love for the Lord.
09/18/10
There was some great description here and some wonderful insights into the human character. I found it a bit distracting the way you starting describing the individual from Lee-Ann's perspective rather continuing with the man's own inner psyche as the MC. Maybe something to watch out for in the future.
09/19/10
Good writing and great insight. On topic very very well.
09/21/10
The ending surprised me, but I liked it very much.

Very good writing!
09/22/10
I wondered the whole way through who would spend time staring at someone in a washroom, and know so much about the inner hurts of this powerful man. The ending made it all come together.