The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
Hope faced her fear, calling on God. He was her hope.
09/21/05
This is very good! You use sentence fragments very effectively, to increase the tension and the acceleration of the piece. I only have one problem, and that's with this sentence: "...and her legs scrambled to close the door with a slam... It seems awkward. Overall, an outstanding piece of writing.
This kept me going from start to finish. I liked the imagery!
This was very effective; very suspensful and the short sharp sentances maintained the pace very effectively. An exciting read. God bless.
Felt the suspense in this one... wish I would have known why she was being chased (or did I miss something?)... Liked this one, but had a hard time when you spoke about Hope, and other times spoke as if she was telling the story. I think it would read easier if you used "her" or "she" instead of "Hope did this or that..." Good job. Blessings, Amy Verlennich