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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: See (07/22/10)

TITLE: Beneath The Fatherís Gaze
By Melanie Kerr
07/29/10


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You saw my first breath taken as
My tiny fist unfurled -
You and I together part of
Our created world
Our plan conceived in heaven to
Redeem this fallen race
A precious chance for every man
To gaze upon Your face

You saw me in the workshop as
I learned my fatherís trade
My fingers rested gently on the
Wood before me laid
You saw me in the Temple
Your own sweet house of prayer
I gathered men around me
My Fatherís truth to share

You saw me in the river with
The water and the dove
And pulled away the curtain as
You spoke your words of love
You saw me in the desert waste
The hunger on my face
The serpent with his twisted truth
I chose not to embrace

You saw me touch the leperís hand
With everything restored
Then others lame, and blind, and deaf
Your wholeness on them poured
You saw me lift the bread on high
And into pieces break
And watched the thousands gathered there
A precious meal partake

My life was lived beneath your gaze
You never looked away
Until the final conflict came
That dark and dreadful day
You saw the whip that ripped my back
You saw the crowd that bayed
You saw the nails they hammered in
And knew Your love displayed

And then You turned Your face away
Such loneliness I knew
Lost, alone, forsaken as
The darkness slowly grew
You didnít see me fix my gaze
Beyond this awful scene
And see by faith forgiveness givín
And man made whole and clean

You waited Ďtil the angels came
And rolled away the stone
I wasnít there within that tomb
But stood before Your throne
I looked and saw the smile upon
My Fatherís joyful face
No words You spoke, but arms outstretched
I felt Your strong embrace


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This article has been read 633 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 08/01/10
Beautifully done and such an accurate account. The poem flowed effortlessly as I read it.
Philippa Geaney 08/01/10
Beautiful poem and right on topic. So full of love too.
Laury Hubrich 08/02/10
Very cool POV. Love it!!!!
AnneRene' Capp 08/03/10
Wonderfully written with a beautiful flow and was awestruck with your mesmerizing POV. Awesome!
Beth LaBuff 08/03/10
I like the all-encompassing nature of this. The contrast that begins your next to the last stanza (and with your title) is profound, "And then You turned Your face away..." Very nice work!
Verna Cole Mitchell 08/04/10
You've written a beautiful poem about our Lord with a glorious ending.
Lollie Hofer 08/04/10
You rhyme was perfect, not one word was forced. I've read several lovely poems so far but this one is my favorite. I like how you laid out Jesus' life in the flow of your poem and how the Father was there with Him.
Maria Egilsson 08/04/10
This is profound. It brings the humanity of Jesus so much to the forefront. It also breathes with the love of a father for a precious child. How great is the Father's love for us as well. How great the sacrifice Jesus made and paid. Absolutely spine-tingling!!
Mona Purvis08/04/10
Precious and priceless. I love it.

Mona
Kate Oliver Webb08/04/10
An amazing POV, creative and definitely out of the box. But above and beyond that, the voice of our Lord sharing in a beautiful way His life and victory--well, it just blessed me in unexpected and glorious ways. Thanks for sharing.
Lollie Hofer 08/05/10
I've already commented on your poem but wanted to congratulate you on your second place win. I knew this would do well...I've read lots more stories and it's still one of my favorites.
Beth LaBuff 08/05/10
Congratulations on your level placing and Editor's Choice for this wonderful poem!
Seema Bagai 08/05/10
This is a beautiful poem. I enjoyed reading it. Congrats.
Angela M. Baker-Bridge08/07/10
So unique and well done! Congratulations.