The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
09/12/05
This one sent chills up my neck and bought a lump to my throat. What a beautiful story of extreme courage in the midst of overwhelming fear. You’ve really connected with your character, her fears and needs. I love the idea of her little brother, the painter, helping her see the world. The name of the dog was a stroke of genius! Bringing us back to the beginning and underscoring what was ahead for Lisette. Well done and thank you. Yeggy
09/13/05
Great story! You portrayed the character well and made us really understand her fears. Well done!
09/13/05
Ditto to everything Yeggy said! Only thing I would add was that I also liked the beginning where you kept us in suspense about the problem, and the word Freedom and its significance to her. Really well done! Karen
09/14/05
This is beautifully, beautifully written. Thank you.
09/14/05
Good work!
09/14/05
Loved this! Let me know if you want a few suggestions! Enjoyed the read as always.
What an endearing and beautiful story! You also educated me on a few challenges to blind persons that I had not thought about before.
Great job Amy! I especially liked the line about gum on a bench or jam on her cheek. Never thought about those types of limitations.
09/16/05
Amy, this is absolutely fantastic. You've let us fall in love with your character.
09/17/05
Very nice, Enjoyed this one :) nice touch with the dog's name.
09/17/05
Excellent. I wouldn't be surprised to see this in the winners circle. Outstanding. I only had one issue.... I think the dog's name was really forced. Sorry! Would have been better to call the dog "freedom" or tie it in some other way. But, that's a little thing in an excellent excellent story.
09/18/05
I loved reading this, could feel Lisette's anxiety. Agree with Maxx about the dog name though.