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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Hmph! (03/04/10)

TITLE: Faux Pas
By Laury Hubrich
03/11/10


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Kristen looked at the time then counted two hours backwards. “Hmmm…nine o’clock.” She scrolled down to the M’s on her cell.

“Hello?”

“It’s me.”

“What’s up?” Melissa asked.

“Only three more days til your birthday.” Kristen whispered into the phone.

“Woopee. One year older.”

“Yes, but more importantly, five months older than me,” she said with ornery glee.

“Whatever. Enjoy it while you can,” Melissa told her, clearly not amused.

“I intend to, thanks. Wanna know what I got you?”

“I’ll find out soon, right?”

Kristen sighed. “Yes, but don’t you want to guess?”

“Do you want me to?” Melissa strung her best friend along with expert precision.

“Aren’t you the least bit curious?”

“Not really.”

“Just because you want to drive me crazy.”

“Well…” Melissa’s voice went up in that funny way she had, her trademark.

“I mailed it Friday.”

“What is it?”

“It’s a…hey, you’re supposed to guess, not trick me into telling you.”

“Can’t say I didn’t try.”

“So…”

“So what?”

“You gonna guess?”

“Oh, ummm, is it bigger than a bread box?”

“Exactly how big is a bread box?”

“Shut up. Do you want me to play this game or what?” Melissa questioned.

“Okay, no, it isn’t bigger than a bread box.”

“That narrows it down. I think I know what it is now.”

“You are so NOT funny,” Kristen declared.

“I’m sorry, I like surprises, okay?”

“But it’s fun to guess.”

“Not for me.”

“Never mind,” Kristen changed subjects. “What’re you doing today?”

“Same ole stuff…housework, cooking – boring.”

“Me, too. Doing anything special for your birthday?”

“Are we back to that?” Melissa asked, exasperated. “I doubt it.”

“Sorry. It’s like that for me, too. Just another day.”

A sigh was heard on both ends of the phone at the same time.

“Know what, Melissa?”

“What?”

“I’m so glad you’re my best friend.”

“Me, too, but I still don’t want to guess what my present is.”

“Wow, you’re a mood buster,” Kristen giggled. “I guess after almost a year you know me well.”

Another sigh echoed through the phone lines.

“You’re coming to see me in four months. That’s a good birthday present,” Melissa said.

“Four months is forever.”

“It will go fast,” Melissa assured her friend. “So, what did you get me?” She tried to break the somber mood.

“Nothing, so there,” Kristen could play the game, too.

Melissa giggled. “You mailed me a box of nothing? Didn’t even put some hugs and kisses in it?”

“So you’re interested now, huh? Let’s talk about what we’ll do when I get there.”

“Okay. What do you want to do?”

“I want to wrap my arms around you from behind.”

“Oooo, is that a hint?”

“What do you mean?” Kristen felt trapped.

“You didn’t buy me figurines of two friends with the one’s arms wrapped around the other from behind, did you?”

Kristen coughed. “Why would you guess that?” she asked quietly.

“No reason. Never mind. We’ll go sightseeing, of course.”

“What are you talking about?”

Melissa sighed. “I guessed, didn’t I?”

Kristen covered the phone to muffle her sniffles. “Guessed what?”

“I’m sorry. It’s just that when I looked for your birthday present last year I found the same thing and almost bought it. Besides that, you always tell me I should be a private investigator. I put things together, it’s a gift.” Melissa worked hard to cover up her faux pas.

“Hmph.”

“I’m sorry. Listen, you’re the one that forced me to play the game.”

“Maybe you’re wrong,” Kristen tried to hide her disappointment.

“I’m sure I am. I can’t wait until my box comes.”

There was silence on the other end.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin your surprise.”

Kristen pulled up out of her momentary slump, “It was my fault. I can’t keep a secret for anything, especially not from you.”

“I’m sorry. You okay?”

“I’m fine. I guess we better get our day started, huh?”

Melissa sucked in her breath. “Okay. I love your gift. Great minds think alike.”

“You’re a brat.” Kristen recovered for the moment.

“And that’s why you love me, right?”

“Just for that I’m going to sing to you.”

Melissa laughed.

Kristen sang the traditional happy birthday song off-key to spite her smart-aleck friend.

“It’s not my birthday yet,” Mel declared.

Kristen laughed. “Doesn’t it sound like I need the practice?”

“True, that. Hey, Kristen.”

“Huh?”

“Sorry I’m such a good guesser.”

“I’m sorry you’re a good guesser, too.”


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This article has been read 435 times
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Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 03/13/10
This was a cute exchange. I can empathize, I always guess my gift even though I want to be surprised. I yearn for more information about these 2 girls. The dialogue was realistic and gave me a chuckle here and there.
Sarah Elisabeth 03/17/10
lol, this almost sounded like a conversation between me and my best friend! Realistic dialogue, good job!
Beth LaBuff 03/17/10
oh wow! What fun you've wrapped up in this story! I'd like to hug both of them! (and I think I noticed the use of daughter names, right?) :) What a riot that this is true!!
Lyn Churchyard03/17/10
You're mad-the both of you lol. How wonderful though, that you know each other so well. My friend and I have known each other for 34 years and more often than not, buy each other the same thing for Christmas. Good job girl!
Edmond Ng 03/17/10
Interesting read and dialogue! (",)
Rikki Akeo03/17/10
As a mom of teenagers, 'true that' is right on the mark for their dialog!
Gregory Kane03/22/10
Good banter. I laughed out loud at the exchange about how big a bread box is.