The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
02/25/10
You have vividly captured how innocence confronts the ugliness of a most shameful era, and bridged the chill with a reassuring close. Tragically so many could not know the same reassurance, but very well done.
What an awesome entry. Everything was so real, I felt like I was in hiding with the family. I could see this as the start of a novel.
You captured my attention and kept it with this well written memory. Thank you for sharing.
I agree with all above comments. The very vivid descriptions and word use drew me in. Dialogue top notch also. Just excellent, all around.
02/26/10
Excellent! Loved your Title, after reading the story and comprehending it. Sounds like something that comes from "True Life"...Kudos! well done!
02/27/10
Well done!!! So well written. Congratulations on bringing to life humanity within inhumanity.
03/03/10
Wow, the ending did it! What a gripping story
Great job of putting the reader right into the situation at hand and holding them throughout the read. Your asides to the food, the matches,all of it wonderfully described.
03/03/10
This was captivating, pulling me to the end. It does feel like it could be lengthened into a novel to include what happened in the years between the night of escape and the entry of Papa into the shop. Great description.
I love your descriptions and the way you drew me in to this story. Excellent use of your word limit.
03/03/10
Loved this story! Very gripping and well written.
03/03/10
I like the crisp, clear writing here. It compelled me to read, to know more. The "voice" is almost emotionless, but your words brought out my emotions as the tragic story unfolded.

I'd like to hear where and how they slept during the day while they traveled at night, and more details of the capture, but I know the word count prevented that.

Great job on the topic this week!
I've read a lot of books with stories of Holocaust victims. Your writing was very good. I think you should consider writing this again without regard to word count so that you could tell the story more fully. There is so much more that could be done with it. Great tie-in to the prompt for the week!
03/03/10
Excellent writing! A very well written story that kept me captivated from start to the end. The imagery is so vivid and I like the way you lead your readers to think like the MC, the unsure feeling and abandonment of not knowing what to believe. I like the ending too, the way the story closes with the sense of relieve, yet with unquestioning acceptance of ambiguity which had become no longer important with the return of the MC's father, because the rest is history.