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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Phew! (02/11/10)

TITLE: Thick White Peace
By Ada Nett


As long as it had been in the future I was doing pretty good. But suddenly the future had become tomorrow and I was beginning to lose it. I felt nauseous. My heart was pounding. I couldn’t think. My brain was frozen. I felt exactly as a bird must feel when it stares helplessly mesmerized, into the eyes of a deadly snake. I needed help and I needed it fast.

I grabbed my cell phone and headed out onto the porch. With a shaking finger I pressed the contacts button on my phone. My mind floundered, “What was her name?”. I was being so attacked by fear I could not remember the name of my mentor. The woman who had been there for me since the day I’d found out the man I’d been married to for thirty-two years, the man I had born six children with, was an adulterer.

I scrolled through the names, nothing registered. I took a deep breath and scrolled through them again, staring at letters, a ,b, c’ s that just wouldn't connect into sensible words. I closed my eyes, “ Lord, help me, I pleaded” .

Hot tears slipped out from under my closed lids and ran down my face. I was not going to make it. The stress of the last year and a half was finally culminating in a meltdown. My cell phone’s Cow Girls Don’t Cry ringtone blared loudly and startled me. I almost dropped the phone from my hand.

Wiping the tears from my eyes, I looked at the caller ID . It read Ann, Ann was her name!…“Phew” my mind began to thaw. The neuro-transmitters were beginning to fire messages that were making sense. Desperately , I punched the talk button and with relief I sank into the soft cushions of the porch swing.

“Are you ok?” Ann's caring words flowed through my ear and settled into my spirit , calming the erratic beating of my heart back into a normal rhythm.

“No , I am not okay, I answered, "I am being attacked by fear". I am so afraid of what will happen in court tomorrow. I am terrified of facing him and losing. I can’t think. Simple things like how to write my own name are requiring more brain energy than I can muster. I was trying to call you and I couldn’t even remember your name. Ann, this is so important, my children’s spiritual lives are at stake. Please , I need you to pray for me.”

Ann’s voice held a quiet strength as she began to speak through the phone and into my ear. I closed my eyes and allowed her words to pick up my trembling spirit and carry me through the heavens to the gates of the celestial palace of God. She carried me to the throne and gently placed me into the very lap of the King! Then she bowed down before His glory and with a beautiful sound began to speak His words over me. Peace poured out, rivers of thick white ivory and settled like concrete into the shaky recesses of my shattered soul. My spirit steadied and stopped it’s trembling. I melted into the embrace of pure love.

Then my Father began to sing over me and Ann joined her voice with His. Beautiful, sweet, sustaining grace filled my spirit with the strength of the King of Forever as I fell asleep in the arms of my mighty God.

“In Jesus name…” I opened my eyes. I was sitting in my porch swing and the word “Amen” was now softly echoing in my ear .I stood up fused back together with a renewed vigor and purpose. I knew tomorrow I would face the giant world system and the man who was seeking to destroy my life but now my loins were girded with strength . The perfect love of my Father had cast out all fear. I responded with deep gratitude as I said good-bye to Ann and went back inside my home and prepared to battle for my children and my God.

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Member Comments
Member Date
Beth LaBuff 02/21/10
The fear of your MC was palpable and so excellently contrasted with the peace she recieved. I love this sentence, "I closed my eyes and allowed her words to pick up my trembling spirit and carry me through the heavens to the gates of the celestial palace of God." You have some beautiful descriptions and phrases in your writing!
Joy Faire Stewart02/22/10
Excellent descriptions, I especially enjoyed the peace that came from our Heavenly Father.
Jackie Wilson02/22/10
Your words flowed beautifully and were both gentle and strong at the same time. The kind of descriptions that wash over the reader and invoke peace. Thank you!
Author Unknown02/23/10
This is a beautifully told story, I think you did an excellent job of it. Minor thing- the quotes in the paragraph where she's telling Ann what's going on are off I think but it could be a copy/paste issue, too.

I think you did a good job here.
Lollie Hofer02/23/10
The fear of your mc was tangible. I was trying to remember the woman's name right along with her. Well done. The contrasting peace at the end was also powerful, I could feel it flowing through her.