The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
02/18/10
Quite a story. And certainly on topic. Very good.
02/19/10
nicely done. on topic, engaging. good conflict and a "happy ending." nicely done.
02/20/10
Very good mix of emotion, with good detail linked with humour and a touch of panic.
Your third-last paragraph needs to be broken up to help us identify the different characters as they enter the conversation, but a very credible portrayal.
The story kept me intrigued. Good work!
Phew! Amazing grace of God in that situation, and patient praying wife. Great story, well-told.
02/20/10
Again proof of why God created woman, men can be so stubborn. I truly believe half the men that are in there graves, didn't have to be there :) A few little tense problems here and there but definitely kept the reader engaged. I was thinking gallstones, kidney stones...good job!