The Official Writing Challenge
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I like the first ending..seems more realistic. I think the way you used the topic word sends a powerful message many of us can relate to. Great job.
01/29/10
Made me cry and wonder how often I have brushed my children aside either as a mom or a teacher. First ending he reaped what he sowed, second, thank God his daughter had a forgiving heart. Good job.
All too often the case. A good reminder of how little moments can cast permanent blots on our lives. Good job.
02/01/10
I like how you give your reader a choice of endings...that is different...but in this case different is good. I pray God will bring this story to my rememberance thoughout the week every time I want to push my grandchildren aside. Thanks for reminding me how precious my children and grandchildren are to me.
You "preached" a great message with this story. I liked having a choice of the endings. I'm a "sucker" for a happy ending, so...
Very touching story. I'm afraid it is all too often a true story for many. Thank you for sharing.
Reminds me of the song "Cat's in the Cradle." Sad, how some people forget to cherish the little, special moments of life. Well written. I liked the second ending, because I like happy endings.
02/01/10
I also heard Harry Chapin singing as soon as I hit scene two, and I found both of your endings equally moving. Congratulations on drawing some much emotion from such economy of words.
02/01/10
I like your creativity with an "alternate ending." You have a great message in your entry!
02/02/10
An effective but disturbing entry. Ouch.
This was an effective way of showing the all too common problems in too many families. I, too, liked the first ending. Not that I liked the guy reaping what he sowed, but it's more realistic.
Very touching story and an excellent reminder of what is important. Because I like happing endings, I preferred the second and was please that was the way it ended.
02/03/10
Great message, wonderful writing! I appreciated the "snapshot" of each of those moments. I would have enjoyed reading another additional snapshot or two before the closing section.
Love your title and the way it ties so well into your overall message. I'm torn between the two endings. I know the first to be more realistic, but the 2nd gives us so much hope. Great job.
Thank you for this. I'm torn between the endings too. This story reminds me of the song Cats in the Cradle...
02/03/10
This piece makes you think how much we miss in the daily rush of things. Great story
02/03/10
I need to read this EVERY day... every time I'm tempted to tell my little boy, "Not now, Sweetie, Mommy's busy." Very poignant--well done.