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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Huh? (01/21/10)

TITLE: Motorcycle Moments
By Joy Bach
01/22/10


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I should have seen it coming, when my husband asked oh so innocently, “Instead of our usual Friday night date, could we go look at motorcycles?” Huh? Motorcycles? Why hadn’t I thought of that?

24 hours later we were the proud owners of a 1997 Honda Shadow Spirit with 1,100 cc’s. I was sorry I asked about that last part. I really didn’t want to know 1,100 cc’s meant it had a lot of power and could go fast.

Saturday evening we had our first motorcycle discussion when he thought my car should now reside outside the garage to make room for the motorcycle in the garage. Huh? Boy was he wrong.

5:15 Sunday morning…and my husband was getting up.

“John, are you OK?

“I’m too excited to sleep. I’m going for a ride.”

And so, good little wife that I am, I got up to see him off. Right? Wrong. He had told me what he was going to do and I wanted to watch...and possibly laugh.

We had ordered helmets, but they hadn’t come in yet. So he was going to have to use a helmet that was over 20 years old. The inside was all torn up and little black flakes were coming off. To keep the black stuff from getting all over his balding head, he placed a washcloth on his head before he put the helmet on. You gotta love him.

The helmets still hadn’t arrived by Wednesday and he just couldn’t wait any longer. He wheeled the motorcycle out of the garage; we climbed on and sat in the driveway in front of God and all the neighbors, while he gave me instructions.

“Just be one with the bike.” He held up his hand and pointed to the palm. “This is the bike”. As he pointed to his thumb, he said “This is you. The bike leans this way,” he said as he leaned his palm over, “you lean with it. It leans the other way, you lean the other way.”

Huh?

Then he decided we needed some signals to communicate on the road. He held school right there in the driveway.

He stood behind me and patted me on my sides. “This means OK or yes”. Pushing with his hands from side to side on my waist he explained that would tell him I planned to adjust my position. He ran his hands up my sides, explaining that would mean “I don’t know what you said”. As he rubbed his hand back and forth on my back he told me that would mean “no”. Rubbing up and down on my back I was instructed that would mean “Stop the next chance you get”. Poking one finger in my back he indicated that would mean “Stop now!”

Huh?

The helmets arrived on Thursday, so we discussed taking a short trip. A four-hour ride to northern Idaho was not my idea of a short trip. But that weekend we headed out. Right away I noticed he was giving me a signal we hadn’t talked about. He was holding his left hand out and pointing to the side. Huh? A few miles later he did it again. What was he trying to tell me? Was he pointing to road kill? Then I noticed that he only did it when we were meeting a motorcycle going the other way. It was a motorcycle wave.

Since I had been straddling the bike for over two hours, I decided it would be really nice if I could just put my legs together. I rubbed up and down on his back. He got to a stopping place, took off his helmet, looked at me and said, “I don’t know what that signal meant”. Huh? They were his signals.

After a break, we headed on north. An hour later, he pulled into the driveway of some friends, turned the bike off, put down the kick stand and suddenly his foot was headed my way. He was getting off! I said what any typical female would say. YIKE!

He turned and stared at me. His eyes said, “Who are you and what are you doing on my bike?” He had forgotten I was back there.

I held up my hand, pointed to my thumb and said, “I was just being one with the bike”.

I’m sure we will have many more experiences with this new purchase. How about black leathers with fringe...and possibly a tattoo or two? Huh?


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This article has been read 508 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Dolores Stohler01/28/10
Very funny story. I really liked the part about the signals. Good job.
Lollie Hofer 01/28/10
I thought maybe with all the patting and petting you'd forget the bike ride and have a little snuggle time. (Did I really say that?) Funny story!
Connie Dixon01/28/10
This is hilarious. A very good testimony for why men should be selling bikes, not buying them. Glad you can make light of it. Good job on topic!
Carol Penhorwood 01/28/10
Boys will be boys with their toys!
Margaret Gass01/28/10
Good job...funny from start to finish! I liked your details--black flakes, washcloth, signals and all--and the "one with the bike" comment at the end was a nice touch. That could be your tatt! LOL
Gina Fifo01/28/10
You should be able to find a "home" for this story - too funny. Typical guy!
The Masked Truelovers01/29/10
For this topic, I also wrote something regarding men/women differences. Your piece was a little more understanding of the guy. My article was more satirical, trying to hint at the importance of communication and compromise in a relationship.
Gregory Kane01/31/10
I feel an urge to defend boys and their toys!
This was great, wonderfully told with a gentle self-deprecating humour throughout.
I also ride bikes but I would never trust myself with something as big as a 1100cc - no way. Stick wings and that beaut and watch it take off!
Karen Macor02/01/10
I could really relate to this story. Been there, done that but you were able to relate it beautifully. An enjoyable read.
Kenneth Heath 02/02/10
Having been a biker for 38 years, I really enjoyed your story.My bike's top speed is 145mph, so my wife has long given up on the hand signals.(she can't use them when we are riding so fast, as she is holding on for dear life.)She does however punch me in the ribs (they are permanently bruised) when she is feeling unhappy about the way I am riding and if I do not slow down, I have learned from bitter experience that all cudling will cease forthwith!!!Be concerned when he wants to park the bike in the living room, always wear protective clothing, even leathers (I have crashed at 120 and they do save your skin)and forget tatoos God forbids them.Ride on Ken.
Micheline Murray02/02/10
Reminds me of our honeymoon in Bermuda(long ago!)--We rented a moped-and my new hubby drove with me in the back. It was horrible! He kept leaning one way or the other as the road curved; I thought we were going to tip over. Imagine his reaction at the end of the day when I revealed that I'd spend the whole time trying to "balance us" by leaning the opposite way he did!!! I guess he thought I knew something about mopeds!!

As far as the signal learning in the driveway---I was waiting for neighbors to come out and ask what was going on! :)