The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
01/16/10
Loved the atmosphere at the beginning. Cute story.
01/17/10
Loved the setting at the beginning, the ending was great. I'm not sure if the boy's thinking is older than eight though (when he had the pipe). Overall a cute story.
01/18/10
Nice story. Likes the descriptions

I would like to see some more dialogue.

Were you the boy?
01/18/10
Very cute! I wonder why you tell it as a flashback instead of using the beginning as the start of the story about the toe. The ending line made me smile. Nice job. :)
01/21/10
Wonderful, believable story! Congratulations on placing in your level! Have you seen the Writing Challenge forums? Great job!
01/24/10
Great story, Virgil. You captured boyhood curiosity very well - I've always wondered what made littles boys tick!
Congrats on your placement. Well done -I enjoyed this story.