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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Ow! (01/07/10)

TITLE: Barn Dance
By Fay Ternan


“Mom, the boys are at it again!”

“Anybody bleeding? ”

“Not so’s I can see but they’re really wailing on each other.”

“Okay, I got it.” Dorothy grabbed the garden hose, cranked up the pressure and sprayed the antagonists down. “Knock it off, you guys. You’d think brothers would treat each other better!

Icy water pelted them as they raced away, the fight drenched out of them.

Leo’s jaw burned. Bob had nailed him pretty good. He’d just wait and whip him again when he least expected it. That arrogant so-and-so, I’ll teach him. What’s mine is mine and he’d best leave it alone! What an animal. I can’t believe he bit me, too.

Refusing to limp, Bob sought sanctuary in the shop. Out of Leo’s sight, he finally checked his aching leg. Yow, that stings. Must have happened when he rolled me into that barbed wire. Couldn’t let up though, not with her watching. Leo doesn’t deserve her.

As evening light faded and darkness wrapped its arms around the farm, the boys strolled casually in for dinner. Pointedly ignoring one another, they sneaked peeks from the corners of their eyes, watching every move.

The one who was the cause of their quarrel refused to acknowledge either one. Instead she cast almond-eyed glances at Garry. The brothers didn’t challenge their older, faster cousin. He’d whipped both of them soundly several times already.

Deflated, Leo and Bob made their way to bed. Pride no longer kept them apart. They nursed their wounds and complained about being rejected.

Early next morning, the boys went about their daily routine. Daylight exposed the evidence of yesterday’s fight.

“Mom, Leo’s not looking so good this morning.”

“Be right there.” Dorothy’s jaw tightened as she surveyed the damage. “Ow, that’s gotta hurt. Looks infected.”

“Lottie, call Dr. Johns and see if we can get in today.”

Call placed, car loaded, the trip took an hour. Office staff put them in a room right away. Three stitches, a shot of antibiotics and they’re ready to go.

“Just keep him quiet, Dorothy. Hot pack the jaw to keep it draining and he’ll heal just fine.”

“Thanks, Doc. We appreciate your help.”

As Leo rested on the way home, Dorothy ran her hand over the shaved hair on his head.

“Well, dude, I hope you learned something today. Fighting over the girls can really get ya hurt.”

As her fingers still caressed his head, Leo gave up the purr that couldn’t be denied.

“Nice song, Leo, for a dumb ol’ barn cat.”

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This article has been read 375 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Lisa Tyre01/15/10
Cute and clever! Good job.
Robyn Burke01/15/10
Cute! About halfway through I thought maybe these were animals but I was thinking dogs so the ending still surprised me.

You have some beautifully poetic descriptions in your piece.
Kimberly Russell01/15/10
This was really cute--and I didn't pick up on the cat part until the very end...so had to read it again! Nice job and I especially liked the title.
Rachel Phelps01/16/10
Awesome! This one is definitely in my top stories for this week. Great writing with an excellent pace and rhythm. Well done!
Linda Boulanger01/16/10
I was totally surprised! That hardly ever happens to me so when I find it, I love it. Great job!!!
Karlene Jacobsen01/17/10
Creative... Perhaps italicize thoughts to set them apart would help. I enjoyed this very much, esp. the surprise ending. ^_^
Lisa Johnson01/18/10
The ending caught me by surprise too. I didn't see it coming. Cute story!