Oktober 28 20009
Dear Misus Snagelhopper,
I now you told us to rite abowt goin green but I need to now abowt wich green thang you meen. At furst I thawt you ment the chawkbord cuz that is wear you rote it and its green. Not much to say bowt a chawkbord other than its green and I dont think its goin anywear. Its alwaz bin in the sam plas.
I askd mom wat goin green ment and she told me bout her diet. She sez she can only eat green food. Sumhow eatin green food iz gonna help her zip up her blak dress. Gess that is wi I saw her pikin out the green m and ms and eatin thim. I ate the uther culers so she culd stay on her diet this tiem.
I askd dad bout green thangs and he gav me a doller. He told me not to spind it all in won plas. Then he starded goin on bout sumthin cald the refreshin and how hez gotta git out of it. If dad aint takin baths no more, Im not eether.
I wint to my dog Fizz bout wat goin green is—and I now wat you thinkin Misus
Snageltooth Snagelhopper but I hav herd Fizz talk. Anywaz I kep feedin him treets win he got reel clos to tellin me and he throo up on my shoo (it wuz green so I gess he did anser me).
My baby bruther must hav bin talkin to Fizz cuz win I askd him he rubd snot all over my noo shert. Seein as how my shoos and shert were messd up, I wint owtsid to play. My nabor with the oranj hare had a jigantik piel of trash so I wint to chek it owt. I fownd 10 m and m rappers. I thawt that was reel stranj cuz mom told me that owr nabor with the oranj hare haz got da beetes and she cant hav no suger. I hope da beetes never gits me. Mabe mom walkd a bit to far and aksidently put her trash in whatshername’s yard.
Anywaz, I fownd some reely cool cabnits that I drug over to my favrit tree to bild a treehows. I cant beleev she just throo them away. They got gold nobs and shelvs with reel sharp nayls stickin owt. I figerd it wuznt steelin seein az how it is allredy in the trash. Im gonna use the treehows as a thinkin spot. Thinkin bout things like wy the grass is green and wy teechers ask questyons win they allredy now the ansers.
Rite now Im sitin at the diner tabel becuz mom sed I hav to finesh this split pea soop. She haz got the hole famly eatin green. This will hav to be my thinkin spot fer now becuz this green thang isnt goin anywear. It looks just lik a mix beetween Fizzes and my baby bruthers anser (that’s thro up and snot in cas you fergot). So dont cha werry Misus Snagelhopper. That green smuj on this leter is not a booger. It is just a smushd pea that iscapd from my bol. You mite want the janiter to kleen under yur desk tho. Next tiem you see mom pleeze tell her how thin she looks so she will moov on to red and mabe I can eat pasketi or cherry supriez.
I reely wish I culd go bak owtsied to bild my treehows. I dont think God rowld owt a green carpit just so we culd stair at it with owr fases glood to the winder like Fizz duz win he sees hiz reflexion or a squerl owtsied. See even Fizz noes you aint sposed to be coopd up like dat. I hoep the erth steel looks liek a jinormus playgrownd win I git to be old liek you.
So pleez tell me bowt wich green thang you meen. I am getting purdy
anoyd tierd of this culer so if you want to pik anuther culer that wont hert my feelins neether.
Yer favrit studint,
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