The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/08/09
Very touching, and I love your attitude.

Two suggestions: avoid the use of exclamation points in narrative, and an extra space between paragraphs will make your entries more eye-friendly.

I love the way the red dress motif ties everything together in your entry. Nicely done.
10/14/09
Heartwrenching story,and one that other women need to hear. You did an excellent job showing this woman's difficult and painful journey. This was a very inspiring read, so thank you!
Very real story, for so many people. You asked for critiques: one thing that might bring it to life even more would be to show us some excerpts of what life was like. Include dialoge and action and feeling. In other words, show us what it was like, instead of just telling us. Good job, and I, too, like how the red dress played through it all, changing even as the main character changed.