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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Red (10/01/09)

TITLE: Blind Truth
By Amy Michelle Wiley
10/06/09


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It’s the last thing I ever saw; that flash of red, so terrible in its beauty. I press my fingers against my eyes, the pain as raw as the color, swirling in emotions. Passion, anger… fury even. They fill me and I don’t know which to listen to, which to grasp hold of. Confusion dominates.

The police come, their voices floating over my hospital bed, asking questions I don’t understand. Questions I don’t remember the answers to, if I ever knew. My brain is stuck in that one moment, in that redness so bright it fills my brain, crowds out everything else. Only one other thing is there...a sound, a word, yelled above the explosion.

“No!!” It lingers in the darkness sometimes, only barely tinged with red. I turn it over in my mind, listen to it again, seeking for meaning.

I gather bits of information from what I catch of conversations, from the questions they still ask. Mother tells me more, patting my hand, trying to be gentle. “They say Daniel was dabbling in things, dangerous things. They don’t know all the pieces, but they say he bought parts that could be used to make a bomb.”

The pieces… the facts… are there, shattered by the blast. Torn apart and drifting in the sea of red. I wonder if they can be repaired, put together with the right meaning, or if everything will forever be broken, carried to the grave with Daniel, gone with the vapors of my vision.

I think of Daniel, how he’d been so attentive recently. Did he do it on purpose? I know that’s what everyone is asking, even if it’s silently. I hear the echo again, try to picture what happened besides the red and the yell. Did the bomb just go off too soon? Did he yell “no!” because he’d made a mistake and gotten trapped? Or was the no because it happened at all? Maybe, perhaps, it was a cry of repentance. Would God forgive a cry, just one word? Would the crimson of Jesus’ blood cover the red of the explosion?

For a time I wonder if I’ll find out. The pain is so strong I think I might slip away to the other side, and I’ll see for myself which place Daniel landed. But it abates over the days, pain mingling with medicines, voices, and the colors, always the colors, all the tumbling shades of red.

The doctors come, and for the moment the questions fall to the side, slipping away as easily as the bandages that come from my eyes, one layer at a time. For a moment I think I see, for the red is so bright, so strong.

But it’s a lie. The color I see is the light that took my sight to begin with. The flash was so brilliant, so strong it took everything with it as it faded, leaving only illusions, only memories.

Memories. Have I even those? I draw my hand across my face, feeling the skin that weeps, though my eyes do not. Then suddenly I see it, clear in my mind’s eye. A shadow falls dark against the red, a Daniel-shaped shadow, running not from the blast, but toward it, throwing itself over the redness, swallowing it up. And I know then the red is for sacrifice paid—Jesus’ and Daniel’s.

“I remember. About Daniel.” I speak to the room, my words falling from my mouth. The swirl of emotions and colors slow, and I grab the right one. Passion. “He saved my life.”


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This article has been read 722 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Yvonne Blake 10/08/09
Good progression! I like the way you gave hints along the way and compared it to Christ's sacrifice.
Charla Diehl 10/09/09
Perfect title for this piece--it grabbed me from the first sentence and held me to the last. Your descriptive phrases and the flow of this story made it a very interesting read. Great job.
Sara Harricharan 10/09/09
Some really great details and emotions in here, it keeps you reading to see where the story is going and why. I loved it. Thought it was awesome.
Jan Ackerson 10/13/09
Amy, this is outstanding! Those last few paragraphs--VERY gripping!
Betty Castleberry10/13/09
Excellent descriptions of what your MC recalls.
Unique interpretation of the topic as well. Thumbs up.
Laury Hubrich 10/13/09
Wow. Love your ending.
Lynda Schultz 10/13/09
Tremendous "feel" to this. Gripping story.






























Elizabeth White10/13/09
Wow.
Loren T. Lowery10/14/09
Wonderful and gripping the the conclusion could not have been more perfect. Outstanding!
Shari Armstrong 10/15/09
Very intense :) Had me wondering "Why?"
Carol Wiley10/15/09
Very well written Amy! I like that the main character at least was able to know that he gave his life for her. You always bring out the emotion so well that makes the story come alive.