The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
09/10/09
Oh man, I got goosebumps. Good story. So glad it had a happy ending.
You've woven an excellent lesson into this very interesting story. I was afraid it would be a sad ending.
09/14/09
Nicely told. Mind you, I was expecting the girl to pick up the chocolate bar that the nasty man had left behind!
09/15/09
Having a daughter named Abby made this even a little more intense for me. My inner voice was pleading with her to stay away from him. Loved Abby's observation that her mom smelled like pastry and clean laundry. Ahh. So very relieved that all ended well. A very emotional piece.
Great job. I was so relieved that this didn't end up tragically. Good descriptions and honest relateable feelings of a child that age. Reminds me of my own daughter and how much I want to keep her safe, often putting up with her own remarks of independence.:0) Well done!
Wow, this was an attention grabber. The ending could have been much different; I'm glad it wasn't. Well done.
Very well written. My heart started racing when she went to the car. Praise God for mommies who really care. Well done.
09/15/09
Whew! I was praying for Abby that her mom was watching--good lesson here for kids today--thanks for ending this on a happy note.
09/16/09
So glad your story had a watchful mommy. :-) Nice writing.
09/17/09
I was holding my breath, and waiting, hoping, praying for Abby's mom to show up. I had tears in my eyes when she finally did. Great story... great writing. Congratulations on your EC.
09/17/09
This exquisite story is so relevant. Congrats on your EC, Debbie!
This is a GREAT story! Children would definitely relate to it, and mommies, too. Congrats on your EC!