The Official Writing Challenge
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WOW. I'm not even sure how to respond. Extremely creative and I became quite perturbed with the liberal ideology of Gabby, but I that means you wrote very well to evoke emotion! Well done!
I should have been deleted in the above :)
This story does an amazing job of "showing"--not "telling" about the MC. Poor Gabby--no more prepared for motherhood than MWAEB, and certainly deluded if she thinks her editor-lover will ever leave his wife for her. There is so much to read between the lines in this excellently written story.
08/27/09
Ohhh, some saucy satire! Fantastic message in a clever package...
Love it!
08/29/09
I'm sorry. Maybe it's my age, but I just didn't understand this entry. Now my question is--to no one in particular--is it better to comment on an article that is above one's head, even if she doesn't understand it? Or is it best to just read it and say nothing? It is always encouraging to me to see comments. And it doesn't matter to me if they aren't always positive. That's how a writer grows. But in your case, you are in Master's. I am in only Advanced, so you are more intelligent than I am; thus, I guess, that's the reason this entry just went over my head. God's blessings...Helen
08/30/09
There are many levels to this one, requiring us to dig a bit deeper to find the core of this woman's newly found acceptance of her pregnancy. Cleverly composed and written.
08/31/09
First reading I was a little confused...Second reading i heard a click and it all fell into place. Quite a clever way to connect to this challenge topic!
08/31/09
Wow. How well you show the delusion of one's supposed superior intellect. Especially by a journalist! A job well done. (really) A stretch of the topic maybe, but creative, entertaining and true to the mark. Excellent!
08/31/09
I read this a couple days ago and felt at odds with the MC. So, I think I understand Helen's comment. But, I read it again and stopped to realize what a brilliant piece of writing it is.
Sometimes, as the reader we want a lovable MC. We want them to agree with our way of thinking. So, in a piece like this it is easy to take issue with the MC. I just can't stand her. But, I'm thinking...neither does the writer.
So leaves me thinking, "where does she get off giving advise when her life is in such a mess?"
One to talk about.
Mona
08/31/09
Oops...advice.
08/31/09
Loved this. Loved getting inside Gabby's head through her subtle edits. Very creative.
09/01/09
You have certainly stirred up a hornet's nest with this one! I think it's very clever and rather brave too. I particularly like the way you have used the strikethrough effect to contrast between what she thinks and what she's willing to say. I'm not surprised, mind, that some people just don't get it!
This is clever.

My problem with this is not the content but the voice of Gabby. It does not feel authentic or consistent to me.

Definitely out of the box!
I right away didn't like Gabby. She is brash, judgmental, prideful, and whatever else you want to put in the blank. However at the end, her final note shows she really doesn't have it all together, in fact maybe the classic "You doth protest too much" is going on. Hurting people hurt people, misery loves company, etc...

Very controversial, but there are people like that out there.
09/01/09
Very original idea.

I was wondering if the use of "your keeping" instead of the proper "you're keeping" was intentional. Same question about "should of" instead of "should have"

Smart title.
A well written piece... controversial, yet brave entry.
09/02/09
An awesome, intelligently written entry for the discerning reader! Once just has to shake one's head at Gabby and at the people who think like her. I want to be able to write like you when I grow up.
I have a feelling you're going to be surprised at how this places! While your content may have left more quesions than answers, there's no denying the brilliance of your writing skills. You're GOOD!
09/02/09
Wow, Lisa, this is incredible. To be able to create a character that you yourself loathe is amazing. You are an extremely talented writer, and I definitely admire your ability to step out of the box. Kudos to you. Please keep writing these pieces.
09/02/09
Wow Lisa - you certainly did go way out of the box on this one! I am impressed, because I know this is not how you think or feel! Well done.

There is creativity on top of creativity in this awesome piece. The notes to the editor and the little editing marks are revealing, indeed, as you intended them to be. A thrill to read. Thanks for helping me understand how a writer can take a weekly challenge to a whole new level.
09/02/09
Oh, my goodness! Every word is perfect and perfectly placed, the tone and voice are perfect. I kept giggling while reading her response. Perfect sarcastic humor.

The ending - her note to her "editor" - wrenched me back to the serious desperation of her life.

Did I mention it's perfect? :)
Wow.
09/02/09
A very creative piece with an unusual approach to draw the readers in!

The strikethrough text makes it totally believable and comprehensible of how a person writes and then corrects him or herself on second thought, much like the way a writer or editor does his or her work. Something I feel is lacking in the story which I believe will help put all things right for Gabby and MWAEB is to have God in the picture, especially in the planning for the unexpected. Too many people these days lay off their responsibility for what is unplanned, and this is truly saddening.

Your story gives a tuck at my heart to pray for people such as these. A powerful message in your story for the call of a moral perspective. God bless.

I'm a little speechless--had to go back and read it again. You're terrific!
09/03/09
Brilliant, brilliant! On every level, brilliant! I wish I had 1% of your creativity. I will not be surprised if this is a winner. ;)
09/03/09
Fantastic. Nobody does it like you, Lisa - saucy and bold with a hefty dose of vitamin morals in there. Awesome!
So glad that I finally got around to reading this piece. We did both write on a similar subject for the birth topic. Yours was so much better though.

This is one of those satirical pieces that leaves you with something to seriously think about. Does one need to be completely established before they can be a parent, or does every child deserve to live no matter where their parents are at in life? Thought provoking, and I sure know my answer.

This has your wit and creativity written all over it. I second Jan. I wanna write like you when I grow up. :)