The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/27/09
Oh, wow. I was right in her head - this felt incredibly honest and true and real-to-life. Great use of repetition too. Really liked this one. Powerful
07/30/09
Great job, Josiah, revealing the inter-thoughts of a teenager. It can be difficult trying to write from the opposite sex's perspective (male/female) and I had to chuckle because, in the world we live in today, it could have come across as a male writing about his desire for another male ("follow the clues").
I don't believe it was taken like that in the anonymous pre-ranking version.
It should have placed higher on the Challenge than it did because I believe we "adults" have had very similar feelings growing up.
God bless and keep writing.
07/30/09
Well Jos, I liked this. Just one question: are you attacking your mum and dad? That's the impression I get. Nice story, though.